John Hellâ„¢ profile picture

John Hellâ„¢

Fat people are harder to kidnap

About Me

How It's Made Discovery Channel 5:30 p.m.How It's Made is so cool. The show goes into great detail about production lines, gluing machines, vacuums that open this thing, which spins around, drop in some plastic beads, fluff this up, and bang! out the other end comes shooting a bottle of dish soap or golf balls or jet skis. I don't understand most of it. I'd easily believe it if the announcer said, "Here is where the unicorns add magic dust, and at this end the toilet paper is wrapped in plastic by elves."

My Interests

Nicotine, 91 octane, caffeine, the beach, sunsets, sunrises, buying, mandarin blasters, profanity, kearny mesa bowl, hiking, kissing, resetting my alarm, the cliffs on the Isla Vista beach, pretending im better than you, expensive sunglasses, romanticizing, speeding, eating, the "axe effect," bathing, mach 3 turbo, getting my act together, making out, self introspection, driving by myself in the carpool lane, tight pants, switching to diet,vitamin water, outdated slang, fucking people up, downshifting, carmel frappuccino, nosebleeds, bean and rice and cheese burritos, Jägermeister, upselling, cooking, container gardening, porn, champagne wishes- caviar dreams, swimming pools-movie stars...

I'd like to meet:

Are you fucking kidding me???....

Music:

the faint, the smiths, the cure, KMFDM, the make out boys, Morrissey, huey lewis and the news, depeche mode, the shiny toy guns, eleventeen, the downfall(Isla Vista RIP) the union underground, VGS, bowie, berlin, unbroken, the domeshots, ministry, cat handcuffs, Simpli Cheese, new order, the creatures, carter peace mission, the queers, JAWBREAKER, siouxsie and the banshees, soupdragons, the catherine wheel, xtc, soft cell, rocket from the motherfucking crypt, the sultans, the lemonheads, NOFX, the jesus and mary chain, the strangers sixxx, bad astronaut, popsicko, pink lincolns, ignite, propagahndi, revolting cocks, Lagwagon, the killingtons, the paradise boys, bjork, the cramps, Honolulu Pimps, superdrag, the riverdales, the mighty bosstones, lets go bowling, Postal Service, social distorion, helmet, wham, the special beat, tilt, green day, me first..., skipjack, tim skold, peter murphy, howard jones, peter case, the d-generation x band, the honky tonk man, mel tillis, john cena,kill me kate, sincerely anastasia, steve smith, the muffins, the saber tooth tigers, le tigre, the murder city devils, jets to brazil, screeching weasel, face to face, MY LIFE WITH THE THRILL KILL KULT, moving units, nine inch nails, Placebo, erasure, falco, billy idol, oingo boingo, nerf herder, daft punk, big audio dynamite II , the WWE anthology...

Movies:

Talkies

Television:

PBS, Channel 125

Books:

Word

Heroes:

Flair, Piper, Rhodes, Rotundo and DiBiase

My Blog

Crash ’N’ Burn Victims

Am I going too fastI never wanted to waste the gasYou wanted to go thereI wanted it tooAnd now we're all in a castThey say in Heaven the first shall be lastBut that was a comebackFor people who dream ...
Posted by John Hell" on Wed, 10 Oct 2007 07:23:00 PST

Pink Thoughts

From "HEXES FOR EXES - Out October 9th " Why can't you try and love me Because I'm standing on the edge so shove meThere's no time to rewind to SpringtimeBefore our minds turned coldNow it's winter lo...
Posted by John Hell" on Thu, 26 Jul 2007 08:24:00 PST