Daniel (Daniel) profile picture

Daniel (Daniel)

About Me

I roll drunks downtown while quoting Samuel L. Jackson characters, and it's not because I need the money. The fact that my name is biblical is just coincidence, I was actually named when my mother shook a boggle game and the letters appeared at random. Considering the circumstances I should be the only motherfucker on the planet named Daniel... and I wish I was. I get hiccups more frequently than most people do. I got out of the Navy almost three years ago because I didn't like it anymore. Going to school in Alaska, I do like that. I've traveled around a lot, enjoyed it, hope to do a lot more. And after all those years you can still tell that I'm an American by my complete lack of sophistication. I also enjoy kicking puppies!

My Interests

I'd like to meet:

Maynard James Keenan, David Cross, Bode Miller, Jon Stewart, Timothy Leary (dead unfortunatley), a hot dog and/or pie eating champion, Hunter S. Thompson (also dead), Pat Robertson (so I can punch him in the neck).

My Blog

Kodiak Keeper

I met a girl!!!  Her name is Precious the ravenous blood-thirsty man-slaying death-machine.  She is a brown bear that lives on a small island only a few acres big.  In the interesting b...
Posted by on Thu, 28 Jun 2007 15:44:00 GMT

June 12th

Today is June 12th, 2007, the holiest of days, at least for those of us with eyes to see. Because today I found the Kodiak Masonic Center. "This must be the absolute center of the entire spiritual uni...
Posted by on Tue, 12 Jun 2007 00:27:00 GMT

Letter to Budweiser, with response

My letter.I recently drank a budweiser with a wood chip in it.  What the fuck?  The number on the bottom of the can is 15SEP06 FA19, so you can pretty much fire everyone working that day.&nb...
Posted by on Tue, 21 Nov 2006 17:06:00 GMT

Letter to Coors Brewing Company with reply.

This is a terrible reply to a very good question.  Thanks for the generic letter Jade...FUCK!Here's my letter.First off I would like to thank you for the quality beer at excellent prices.  K...
Posted by on Tue, 21 Nov 2006 15:30:00 GMT

The Book of Daniel

Chapter 4This chapter isn't even written by me!  I'm a lazy, lazy prophet.I like your Christ, I do not like your Christians.  Your Christians are so unlike your Christ. - GhandiWe have just ...
Posted by on Fri, 17 Nov 2006 12:16:00 GMT

The Book of Daniel

Chapter 3It's the denomination segregation sensation!  The Church of Daniel has officially segregated from the Catholic Church.  For more information on how this will affect you, your family...
Posted by on Thu, 16 Nov 2006 18:50:00 GMT

The Book of Daniel

Chapter 2Pope John Paul II has been posthumously excommunicated from the Catholic Church early Wednesday morning after a lot of bureaucratic squabbling in the conclave.  The reasons for the Cardi...
Posted by on Thu, 16 Nov 2006 18:04:00 GMT

The Book of Daniel

Chapter 1Heaven is full.  No more souls will be admitted, according to a press release issued by the office of St. Peter.  The Heavenly Expansion Project has run over budget and beyond it's ...
Posted by on Thu, 16 Nov 2006 17:43:00 GMT

VIDEO - Bloody zac

Posted By:danielGet this video and more at MySpace.com
Posted by on Fri, 13 Oct 2006 15:32:00 GMT

Retired headlines/ Quotes from Mom

Past headlines for present reference. "daniel" "I taught your girlfriend that thing you like." "The one you gotta blow to get a drink around here." "Proud to be the first supporter of the metric alpha...
Posted by on Sat, 23 Sep 2006 21:46:00 GMT