Piece of Piss profile picture

Piece of Piss

About Me

I once caught Dickhead strung from his curtain rails in some sort of intricate pully system with youghurt all over his hands, masturbating furiously. Just before ejaculation he relaxed his body, thus tightening the nooses around his mini-willy and neck in some extravagent asphyxiation attempt. The oddest part was that as his body went limp, a detailed dummy of margret thatcher arose from behind his bed, fully equipt with tit tassles and spread legs.He also fucks dogs and puts the gerbils up his arse, luring them with cheese and sunflower seeds.I WANT TO PUT THIS IN MY MOUTH

My Interests

I'd like to meet:

This is possibly the most entertainment one could ever derive from four, rapidly approaching middle aged cunts, ever. It is also a dance routine I spent a week choreographing at the aged of 11, and these robbing bastards pilfered it, and might I add, done it no justice.

My Blog

In the arms of my cigarette.

My cigarettes and I have reached new levels in our racy and hedonistic relationship. Our illicit affair began one fateful night, not long after an experimental and educational encounter with the bitch...
Posted by on Tue, 15 May 2007 07:06:00 GMT

I went to Amsterdam and then I got arrested.

The title is somewhat a giveaway to this particular jumble of phrases. I went to Amsterdam and saw some cock and fanny in a live sex show and it made me want to have sex too for a while until I realis...
Posted by on Tue, 16 Jan 2007 11:48:00 GMT

Dam usful phrases

Beofre I embark upon my epic adventure, I found the following phrases which may come in handy for my trip...   "Ik heb een ambulance nodig, er zijn overal spinnen en ik ben heel erg bang" means p...
Posted by on Wed, 10 Jan 2007 05:29:00 GMT

Less Magical Mushrooms

The afore mentioned twat, Blower, is up to her old tricks and is trying to re-impregnate the Mushrooms bed. Once again I think failure is imminent, however you will all be pleased to learn that we are...
Posted by on Tue, 09 Jan 2007 00:24:00 GMT

The Most Magical of Mushrooms.

My house mate, who lacks her wits, Decided to grow some mushrooms of the magical kind. I snorted at this proposition believing her attmpts would be in vain. Alas, i was proven wrongen.   Her mush...
Posted by on Fri, 05 Jan 2007 02:46:00 GMT

New Years Resolution.

I have no resolutions, being already perfect in everyway, and perfectly happy with the way things are going. However, I feel there are things that are still owed to me, so as it is a New Year I am goi...
Posted by on Wed, 03 Jan 2007 12:18:00 GMT

Educating mowons

I read an article in the Metro the other day where the Children's minister said that children from a poorer background ought to be educated from the age of two to make up for the bad start they get at...
Posted by on Wed, 29 Nov 2006 02:26:00 GMT

Group Individualism

An extract from the diary of Lieutenant Colonel Mervin Willett Gonin DSO who wasamong the first British soldiers to liberate Bergen-Belsen in 1945.Camp I can give no adequate description of the Horror...
Posted by on Wed, 29 Nov 2006 00:16:00 GMT

Political Cuntiness.

Being the social butterfly that I am, I recieved an invite to a fancy dress party on friday in which the host said he ardently desired my company and felt he would simply die if I didn't go. Being the...
Posted by on Sun, 29 Oct 2006 14:07:00 GMT

The most interesting life of Lady Jenna Hall.

The other night I had a dream where I was a mother and I was with another group of mothers and we were all breast feeding. Shortly after we had to drag ourselves over metal grates and the boss realise...
Posted by on Thu, 19 Oct 2006 14:05:00 GMT