I'm 5'8, i like writting poetry and walking listening to music - killing myself(aka smoke), hanging out, killing time, theres really nothing great about me but whatever--and thats about it------I have no fear in this life - this flesh-people tend to ask me why i am the way i am and why i view things the way i do- I'll explain - i'll give u reason - events in my life in my past - what i've lived through would make since to all my actions ---- my childhood-not so pleasant- i lived in a house with constant abuse-conflict none stop- my mom would take beatings all the time- my dad would always threaten her with telling her he would kill us- so by sacrificing her body we would bare to watch- as time went by this abuse became more and more unbareable - my eyes would see all these things -i watched my mom bleed for me - as i got older maybe 12 i couldent take another day -i had welcomed death into my young life- crying as i swallowed the pain- i crurled up on the floor slowly drifting away and hoping to end the pain- my mother found me on the floor the bottle of pills beside me- no response i would give - she carried my lifeless body out the door screaming in fear she rushed me to the hospital and there i was saved-i wake up and there was her face - tears were falling and they were mine-i asked why am i here - she looked at me-her eyes so clear-----When a child at that age alomost succeed with taking there life -must mean one thing fear not there anymore-- returning home back in hell the days kept passing just like in jail-a scared mind so far behind that is the reason im still so blind--My dad got worser over time - i took the beatings so my mom could hid- i would be bleeding from my head and my face- but that was ok my mom was safe- guns held - infront i stand so i could take the bullet and give a hand- as long as i can remeber i never feared death i was always selfless- AND so it brings me to what i mean i can take a beating anytime of the day aslong as my point gets across one way or another----------i would take my life to save the other becouse i welcome death like a new born child -it is a gift ----i would break my back so u could see everything becouse your life means somthing to you- my life is empity but who new.....
WILL NOW THAT U NO A LITTLE ABOUT ME WHO CARES NO ONE REALLY DOES I NO IF I WAS THE OTHER PERSON ON THE OTHER SIDE READING THIS I WOULD THINK MAYBE FOR A MIN THAT SHIT IS SAD BUT THEN MOVE ON WITH LIFE CUZ PAST HISTORY DOES NOTHING REALLY BUT MAKE U FEEL BAD AND BRING U DOWN BUT IT ALSO HELPS U UNDERSTAND WHY A PERSON IS THE WAY THEY ARE SO I GUESS I JUST PUT THAT UP THERE SO WHEN U MEET ME U WONT HAVE TO ASK AND MAYBE IF U SEE ME ALITTLE WEIRD THEN THAT COULD BE SOMTHING THAT MY MIND DOSENT SEE AS WEIRD AT ALL WELL PEACE OUT ALL U WHO HAVE NO LIFE LIKE ME AND FOR ALL THE -SIDE SHADOWED SOULS- UR NOT FORGOTEN UR JUST PUSHD TO THE SIDE AWAITING FOR THE DAY THAT DEATH WIPS AWAY THE REST OF THE WORLD ------ death will embrace whats not cared enough for - why bother to breath if there is nothing real in this fucked up place . .
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Mudvayne Death Blooms
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