My profile says I am married, married to whom? you may be asking. Why, I am married to the sea, of course.
So fear not ladies, I am still available, but only if you are prepared to compete with a mistress as harsh and as unpredictable as the ever-changing sea.
Good luck ladies!
I'm down with anyone who likes to just hang out, have good conversations, make jokes, play games, watch movies or likes music.
I'm also down with people who like to play music, if you wanna start a band, I've got lyrics up the yin yang.
When we meet, there are two things you must get used to.
Number 1: I'm gonna be a dick!
Do not worry, this does not mean I don't like you, I like to make fun of people, poke fun at them and make jokes, even say some things that are downright cruel.
This is all part of the process of getting to know me, this is my own little way of hazing the people whom I deem worthy to call my friends.
Number 2: I will often say and do things that do not make sense.
This is perfectly normal, when I was thirteen and three quarters years old, I had a dreadful crawfish accident.
Upon the horizon o'er yonder I did spy a ship, flying the Jolly Roger. The Captain of this dreadful vessel was none other than Cajun Chef Paul Prudhomme, I guarantee!
He asked me to pass the salt, but unbeknownst to me, it was a cruel pirate trick.
And that is how Evan and his friends defeated THE END!
If stroking this sacred text is a sin, then may I never be blessed.