About Me

I love dive bars, looking into other people's windows, and songs that feature the terms "sookie" and "sho nuff." I can't stand Angelina Jolie NOR Jennifer Aniston. I don't know why anyone likes the Cohen brothers; I prefer the Farrellys. I am great at Scrabble and Cranium; terrible at Monopoly and puzzles. I am the world's worst ice skater (picture Bambi on ice), but I am a ridiculous pinball wizard. We have only so many years to live, so I generally think people shouldn't waste their time in chain restaurants. I am personally three degrees from Kevin Bacon. I am scary. I own a jukebox, a purple suede fringed jacket, and a Paul McCartney doll. I love suspense. This means you'd better never tell me the end of anything. I want to be surprised. And this goes for what's on the dessert menu if I'm still perusing the entrees. In fact, maybe ESPECIALLY that.

Where in the world should you go and live? Your Result: Paris You are a very stylish person who loves their clothes, their comfort and their food. Paris, the city of style, is perfect for you. Every morning you will wake up with a croissant and jam...

London
Bali
Australia, Queensland
On the banks of the Amazon
Italy
Where in the world should you go and live?
Make Your Own Quiz

..t-->My score on../t--> The 3 Variable Funny Test :

the Prankster
((47% dark, 34% spontaneous, 21% vulgar))

your humor style:CLEAN | COMPLEX | LIGHTYour humor has an intellectual, even conceptual slant to it. You're not pretentious, but you're not into what some would call 'low humor' either. You'll laugh at a good dirty joke, but you definitely prefer something clever to something moist.You probably like well-thought-out pranks and/or spoofs and it's highly likely you've tried one of these things yourself. In a lot of ways, yours is the most entertaining type of humor because it's smart without being mean-spirited. PEOPLE LIKE YOU: Conan O'Brian - Ashton Kutcher

..t-->Link../t-->: The 3 Variable Funny Test ( ..t-->OkCupid Free Online Dating../t--> )

23 Minutes In Brussels lyrics

By : Luna

left my hotel in the city
everything was clear and set
you were on your way and sittin' pretty
that was just a bait and switch
say a prayer
for you and me
say a prayer
tell me do you miss me
23 minutes in brussels
why can't they just leave us alone
are we gonna to get into a tussel
cannot take an airplane home
say a prayer
for you and me
say a prayer
tell me do you miss me
(repeat

.. More free lyrics

My Interests

I'd like to meet:

Whoever made that incredible craft wire.

My Blog

Passing By The Cemetery, Volume I

For the past six-and-a-half years, I have passed by Oakwood Cemetery nearly every weekday as I drop my kids off (and occasionally pick my kids up) from high school. As a child, I never preferred this ...
Posted by on Thu, 08 Jan 2009 12:40:00 GMT

Breaking a Ring, Breaking a Heart

When I was in kindergarten, I was the tallest girl in the class. Actually, I was almost always the tallest girl in the class. But my point is that, even in kindergarten, I was the tallest girl in the ...
Posted by on Mon, 08 Sep 2008 20:47:00 GMT

Christmas Metaphor

I am a Christmas presentDisguised hurriedly in colorful holiday adornmentHeld together with Neosynephrine, Visine, and Tylenol PM.I hope I don't fall apart before I get unwrapped.
Posted by on Wed, 05 Dec 2007 08:55:00 GMT

The Toe, The Chipmunk, and the Black Crow

An errantly placed gym bag came into unexpected contact with my toe this morning, and the next thing I knew, the gym bag hit the wall at about 97 mph, as I howled that no one cared that I may have suf...
Posted by on Thu, 27 Sep 2007 21:00:00 GMT

Lipstick, Lipstick Everywhere

I have spent my entire life looking crappy in lipstick. Ask anyone. They'll say "She looks crappy in lipstick. Her lips are too thin. Her eyes are too big. It's all too obvious. She looks like a stree...
Posted by on Wed, 12 Sep 2007 22:39:00 GMT

Who is Scratchy Wilson, really?

I just updated my profile page: my photo, my quote, my song, my status, my mood. I don't have much time for this blog, but I am motivated to write by the surprise I felt when I did a Google search thi...
Posted by on Tue, 21 Aug 2007 10:00:00 GMT

Ode to My Rx Q2 Issue Brief: A Haiku

PharmaceuticalsAre more trouble than they're worthAnd they cost a lot.I'm almost finished.Tomorrow is July 4th.I might have to work.
Posted by on Tue, 03 Jul 2007 21:14:00 GMT

Cape Cod Blues

I awaken groggily. What time must it be? The clock by the bed tells me that it's too early for me to get up, but all of a sudden I remember where I am. The shades are drawn; I squint at the edges to s...
Posted by on Sun, 17 Jun 2007 11:28:00 GMT

Utilities and Everything Else All Going Wrong

Yesterday was a total day gone wrong. Everything I touched blew up. 1. I begin to pay the bills. I open the first bill (AT&T), and I immediately have a question about a credit...
Posted by on Wed, 16 May 2007 16:34:00 GMT

Things I Have Learned

Ever see that email called "Things I Have Learned" that circles the planet every few months? Well, I was thinking on my way to work of the things that I, personally, have learned, and thought I would ...
Posted by on Fri, 27 Apr 2007 13:50:00 GMT

Tiger Lily Girl

I am here for Friends