40269088

I was born on a cold January day in the small town of Princeton, Minnesota in the year of our Lord 1985. Actually, I don't know what the weather was like but I'm going to guess it was chilly because it was January in Minnesota. I am the child of proud parents Mike and Sue. They are proud parents because of my sisters, not me. As a child I led a pretty normal life, tackling strangers, swearing at passersby, being the best damn wiffle ball player with in a 1/16th mile radius of my house. At the age of 10 I was uprooted and transplanted in Cass Lake, Minnesota. There I quickly made many friends (lie), and soon became one of the most popular and beloved kids in town (bigger lie). Over the years I was given such endearing nicknames as Squeak, Stupid Smellson, and Bitch. At the age of 16 I discovered something called "Marijuana," which helps explain my current mental capacity. After graduating with honors from the prestigious institution known as Cass Lake- Bena High School I was once again uprooted and settled in a shithole called Cokato. I soon left to spend a year and a half (along with thousands of dollars) drinking beer and watching VH1 countdowns. After some soul searching and a registered letter from Saint John's University saying, and I quote, "Get the fuck out, dumbass," I returned to live with my parents in the Cokato suburb of Knapp. I became a master of sanitation engineering at Faribault Foods, Cokato Plant. I decide to attend the prestigious (there is another lie) and award winning Ridgewater College, Hutchinson Campus before dropping out of college again. Actually I don't know if they have won any awards. If they have it was probably a meaningless title like "Cass Lake- Bena Honor Graduate." I have since moved to the Twin Cities to attend Le Cordon Bleu. I must say that I look damn good in my chef uniform. I hope to move to Las Vegas once I graduate so I can be with people who love to drink and gamble as much as I do. That pretty much describes the wondrous glory that is.... Chedda Joe