KillSwitch Engage: The End of the Heartache
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Add to My Profile | More VideosHey my name is Carl William Aaron Qualls. I’m 21 years old and I went to school to Rio Grande University until I made a decision to become a deckhand to work on the river boats. All my life I have wanted to be somebody and make something out of myself and im thinking that this is the perfect way to do that. Alot of crazy things in my life has brought me to this point in my life. I’m going to let you into my life. starting off by what im not…im not a liar, im not a cheater (I don’t believe in it), I’m not a user, I’m not a bad person.. What I am though. is a helper, I’m a caring guy, I’m a believer, I’m a dreamer, I believe in god and im thankful for what he has done for me. Although I have kind of strayed off the path of following god, I still believe there is time for me to come back. I always give my all for everything in my life. (Though sometimes it feels like it’s not enough.) im used to being hurt and in pain. I’ve had a lot of hard and bad experiences in my life. I’m not even sure how I have made it this far in my life. I seem to always get my heart broken by girls. I don’t know why I deserve to be so hurt. I’ve spent a lot of nights with my knees on the floor and my eyes teary. I’ve surrendered to pain because it always seems to rule my life. All I ever wanted in my life was happiness. If I could for once be happy that would be so great!!! Every time I begin to be happy. That same happiness is stolen away as fast as it comes. I always seem to cripple to pain because I carry that pain deep in my heart. My whole life is fallen apart and it’s so messed up. I’m trying to put the pieces back together, but it’s incredibly hard to do that. A lot of people are important to me for many reasons. First I want to start by thanking Joe Pedrick... (best friend) if It wasn’t for Joe being there I wouldn’t be writing this…Joe has been there for me through thick and thin and he always will be. And I would do the same for him. Thanks Joe my heart goes out to you. I’m thankful for Joey, chaz, Dane, Jera, Ashton, Mom, Dad, Brothers & Sisters, Grandma & Grandpa, Kenny, Brittany, Randilyn, Ashley, Tim, the list could go on forever, sorry if I missed you!!! But you know who you are... I love all of you guys!!! A lot of things in my life has brought me to my knees, but im going to stand tall, All I wanted from life was just a chance, I seem to mess up the good things in life, but I’m fixing that, I have lost a lot of people important to me in my life and I have lost a lot of things in my life, Everything around me is fading away from me, I try to grab hold and keep it close to my heart, but sometimes it slips away, I know god is watching me.. and I know my life isn’t going the right way, but im making a change to my life and I’m going to fix all of my wrongs and I’m going up and beyond, im going to go all the way to where I need to go, to reach the life I want, my life isn’t right, but im going to bring it back to the way it used to be, that’s what I need and want, not only for me, but for god. I’m going to walk the way you want me to god, just be patient with me and one day I will make you proud to say that’s my “Boy†I love you.. May be hard to believe at this point, but just give me time to make it right again… lord I’m staying strong!!
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