The God of Rock looked down from his throne with a deep filled satisfaction. The year was 1995 and all his devilish creations had enveloped popular culture. His minions had taken over the charts, the air-waves and MTV (MTVone that is, there was no MTV2 back then you know!). Society was rushing headlong into the excess and debauchery that he craved when all of a sudden, out of the blue his nemesis the "God in heaven" created an abomination called "Indie Pop". The weaker masses fell head over heels in love with this new style of music. No more were girls tattood, and receptive to the affections of the hairy, smelly and ugly. Now they ate Candy Floss and wanted to buy kittens and other such stuff!This made The God of Rock feel a bit sick (just like he did when "the carpeners", "Hanson" and "Bros" had been formed). To make things worse "Take That" were making a comeback!The God of Rock knew he had to act quickly. He threw himself into his Rock Laboratory. There he found a hungry, animalistic pure flash of tub-thumping energy, which he affectionately called "Edd".Next he went to the parts bin marked "Forgotten Geetar Ninjas" and pulled from it the spirit of a pure blood Geordie warrior named "Kel".Next he went to the source of all bass caused Tsunamis and Eathquakes and fondly named it "John".Then The God of Rock knew he would need a stuttering force of audible notes an' that - he selected "Mark".Finally he needed a cohesive force, a glue if you like, that would bind these pieces of subterranean flotsam together. That force was collectively known as Gav & Mozz. They were a duo so fiendishly clever in their cunning that they were like Hitler, Mussolini, Mao Tse Tung, Pinky AND the Brain (and that Stewie off Family Guy) put together!The God of Rock looked at his creation and he was pleased. "Go forth my children" he said. "Go forth and ROCK this vile sanctuary of the average, the meek, the annoyingly polite, the people that innanely say "have a nice day", the re-cyclers, the humanitarians............But most of all the people that say "You've had enough son!".Bredren and Sistren,
the God of Rock brought you....JAM ABRAHAM!
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