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About Me

Stupid things I have said.......☆ I try not to swallow my gum I hear it stays on your credit for 7 years.☆What! No more pool tables at Bills now where am I gonna find a boy with no future? My life is OVER!☆I look like sebastian from the little mermaid and rudolf the red nose raindeer had a summer fling which resulted in the birth of a bouncing baby 27 year old blonde☆Its probably good those girls are throwing food because I doubt they need the calories!♫Do you think Google would know if those Jamacian Runners are on Steriods?♥Teeth are NOT a tool!☆Oh my God! Chris really is McGiver! (After he had just started the car by holding a gum wrapper and a key to the battery...Im not kidding)☆Does someone have an Axe I can barrow...I need to chop a branch off my family tree!☆I like my coffee the way I like my men...full of booze.☆I quit smoking for 2 years but fell off the wagon during a little break down I had while trying to figure out the proper placement of a semi colon.☆What do you mean why cant I admit when Im wrong? You obviously have me confused with someone who gets things wrong!☆No Barbie has never been my roll model...That bitch is plastic and doesn't even have a vagina!☆My phone got sick of hearing all this shit and tried to commit suicide!☆I wonder if George W. can move out today?☆I keep trying to go on headache strike but it just keeps crossing the picket line!☆I wish I had a gun so I could pistol whip myself!☆Monet how am I supposed to RIP when you keep talkin to me??☆I think someone opened a pill buffet and told Paula its all you can eat!☆I do all my outdoor activities in my living room. Thanks Wii!

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My Blog

Myspace got touched by an Uncle!

Going to myspace reminds me of visiting a creepy uncle... No one goes to visit it anymore, but for some reason you still stop by.  There is always some slimeball neighbor who is slightly cross eyed an...
Posted by on Thu, 04 Feb 2010 00:27:00 GMT

twitter.com/maryolenda

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Posted by on Sat, 28 Mar 2009 14:38:00 GMT

Its a shitty world...

Today I grabbed a Guardian (SF local news paper) to read while I ate my dinner.  As i turned throught the pages searching for upcoming shows something caught my eye...A single obituary.  There was som...
Posted by on Mon, 09 Mar 2009 22:28:00 GMT

Why is Myspace always Heckeling me????

I open my page and BAM!  Join a Mafia war...What?  My name is Mary not Carmela I dont want to start or join a cyber Mafia war!  Besides I cant keep a secret isnt that what the Mafia is all about?  And...
Posted by on Sun, 25 Jan 2009 21:55:00 GMT

Im to old to start acting like an Adult now!

So as I do every few days I came home and checked the mail on the way in.  I start going through all the junk shoved in that stinky old box to discover my yearly Social Security breakdown...think...
Posted by on Fri, 10 Oct 2008 06:03:00 GMT

Im not so sure about this whole hands free phone law!! CLOWN CROSSING!

So for the past few months, in California it has been illegal to talk on your cell phone while driving, unless you have a hands free adapter.  This law was apparently an attempt&nb...
Posted by on Thu, 02 Oct 2008 01:22:00 GMT

Good thing myspace cant issue citations for not being cool enough on your own page!

I have enough problems with parking tickets!
Posted by on Fri, 22 Aug 2008 20:47:00 GMT

My page never did anythng to you!

Today one of my friends (who was in my top 8) had a little hissey and deleted me...I really dont care that I got deleted but I do really care that by being deleted his spot on my top friends became op...
Posted by on Wed, 30 Jan 2008 22:20:00 GMT

No more pool tables at bills?? Now where am I gonna find a boy with no future?

My life is over.
Posted by on Fri, 18 May 2007 11:24:00 GMT

Where the HELL is my christmas spirit???

I've tried EVERYTHING!!!  I watched every christmas movie I own (which is alot!)...I listen to christmas music at work...I even got peppermint coffee creamer...NOTHING!  Help me Santa I thin...
Posted by on Sat, 09 Dec 2006 09:27:00 GMT