FAQS
Q. Who are you?
A. I am full of malice and discord. I am the bringer of foolishness and clumsiness. I am the reason they invented helmets. Shudder when you see me approach. When you trip and drop your food in McDonalds... that was me. I pushed you. When your grandmother slips in the bathroom and breaks her hip... that was me. I pushed her too. When you laugh so hard that your coke spews out of your nose and all over the person you're trying to impress... that's not me, but I wish it was.
Q. Where do you live?
A. In a townhouse near the smoggiest, dankest pit in Hell. Location, location, location.
Q. What do you look like?
A. I have two eyes, two ears, two legs, two feet, a tail, two arms, two hands, 10 fingers, 10 toes, a nose, hair, a mouth, and claws.
Q. What do you want to say to the one you love?
A. Goodbye my love, my blackened soul, my ever beating heart. Heaven will be Hell, and Hell will be a comfort compared to a moment without you. I will carry you in my fiercest dreams. Remember me.
Q. What do you want to say to your best friend?
A. Dance puppet! Dance for your master.
Q. What's your best quality?
A. My normality.
Q. What's your worst quality?
A. I love you too much... As if that is ever possible.
Q. What's your attitude towards drugs and alcohol?
A. W.W.A.D. What whould Ams do?
Q. What's your secret?
A. I sell drugs to the misguided youth of America. Escape your pathetic life, feel the sweet pinch of acceptance over and over again. Come my dear kiddies...
Q. Do you have any special talents?
A. I can shove a Q-Tip all the way into your ear.
Q. What does love mean to you?
A. You. You are love. You are timeless and everlasting. You are sleepless nights and beautifully frightening dreams. You and I belong together. I am yours until the stars implode within themselves. You and I are... we just are. Love...
Q. What does friendship mean to you?
A. I have friends to insure my existance in a post apocolyptic world. I will always have a back up source of meat.
Q. Are you a strong person?
A. I'm a smoker.
Q. What makes you angry?
A. People who don't understand me. LISTEN DAMN IT! I love you... LOVE ME. LOVE ME. LOVE ME... you're not understanding me are you?
Q. What makes you happy?
A. Your gray smiles and lifeless tears.
Q. What makes you sad?
A. I'm sad when you're sad. I cry when you cry. I laugh when you laugh. I need you to be happy so I, too, can smile.
Q. How do feel when you think about your happiest memory?
A. I'm gonna go with the obvious here... happy.
Q. How do you feel when you think about your biggest mistake?
A. I didn't know that it would turn out that way. I didn't know he'd pop like a water balloon. It wasn't my fault. It wasn't a mistake it was an accident! AN ACCIDENT.
Q. What are you looking forward to in life?
A. The 'Millenium Educational Reform Act' to kick into effect.
Q. What are you afraid of?
A. Losing my sanity. Keep me safe, keep me sane.
Q. What are some words to live by?
A. Run... RUN!
Q. Do you go to school?
A. No. School is for fools.
Q. When was the last time you cried?
A. I cry when you cry... we've been over this.
Q. What happens when you die?
A. Well after I died I came here. I don't know what will happen when you die. Maybe you'll come here too.
