THE CUT

well i..m in the middle of writing my first book and heres a little sneak peek from chapter 9 ,if you like this the rest of the book is done in the same humor so hope you enjoy and don..t be afraid to add me as it..s good to talk and thanks for taking the time to visit my page regards ..Zack Chiswell .. CHAPTER 9 The cut as we called it, basically meant having a cut of the cake, depending on how good you were at cutting the thing and I was the one of the best! have your cake and eat it! good at cutting my slice when it came down to it, the earners of the year when it came round to take the chance to do it anyway! Glastonbury, reading festival, phoenix, T in the park and whatever big all-night dance event!! much better than me market stalls it was but you couldn’t get nicked or in fuck off gang fights for doing the markets but cutting was first in my book of earners and a hell of a lot more fun what a laugh, now what it was, was just a simple little con with a bit off charm and a bit of the ole blagging which to me it was like shall we say a duck to water. Right you always had to watch each others backs which went with out saying and work as a team, say if there was two full car loads going the drivers were normally roped in not to do the cut but just to drive and watch I’ll backs, they were normally quite handy or at least looked intimidating so they got looked after with a drink at the end and a free ride for the weekend well as long as there weren’t a round up and we all ended up in the nick anyway. So now the Cut is dead and buried to a certain extent and the price of drugs has gone from pound notes to pound coins and the ecstasy tablets has dropped to two pound a pill these days so I don’t mind talking about it. There was yours truly, webby, lee gillmartin, sausage, vinny, George gillmartin and dainmo which was the main outfit and who ever we brought along so what it all came down to was to go out clubbing that week and buy the latest E that was floating about try to keep it in the best tact possible so that our little outfit could duplicate it and believe me if the cut was still on today I wouldn’t be letting on how to do it either, we use to get the pill of the week and stick them in a latex mould let it set pop it out and bob’s yer uncle, madam tusauds eat yer fucking heart out! we done these little beasts to a tee ,perfect copies. now the mix of the E, well if you could call it that comprised of what was a little salt, plaster of paris mix and when they set one of the outfit would painstakingly brush each pill with anti nail bite and for the people who have never bit there nails and never witnessed what it tastes of do your self a right ragging favour and don’t bother, it was the most foul rancid taste I had ever tasted but so were real E..s so they tasted more than believable to say the least and plus they looked identical to what was out that month in the clubs weather they were Doves to Mitsubishis we had them all from the early days when they were fifteen quid a go to the later days when they dropped to five pound a pop! What they went for was fucking lovely while it lasted. .then one of us normally me because I had a steady hand I would make the LSD the acid tabs which consisted with one of us to get the right blotting paper ,not to thick but thick enough to be deliverable, then used to poor two bottles of the anti nail bite solution on a dinner tray then place the blotting paper on top and after two or three minutes take it out and place over the line to dry, repeat it a few times for the rest of the outfit then test out the prints that were kids picture stamps, but the best was the winny the pooh roller pen we had as it left a pooh bear picture, one ever centimetre which was the perfect size and to top it off to serrate them we used an old fashion wall paper cutter that you use to score the bottom of the paper you had just put up, straight along the skirting then you just peeled the access paper off, for the people that are two young to remember the best way of describing it is it looked like a pizza cutter only with teeth and the result was out standing perforating them to a tee they could be torn off with out damaging the other acid tab so for all those people out there that had one of those famous winny the pooh acid tabs hope you enjoyed it as it took me fucking days preparing folks…and to top it off it didn’t cost more than two quid for the pen the tabs went three for a tenner with ease because acid faded out in the mid nineties ! They slowly become extinct so as you could imagine the fad of taking one of these with your mates must have been a thrill to experience, so I was more than happy to accommodate the revellers of the night and nine times out of ten they never knew what to expect and even if they did I was always fair with people just give me it back and I’ll refund you because I can’t go back to my dealer with no drugs and no money so cof up and I will ,sounds a fair deal to me even if you had brought something faulty from a shop you go back with it and slap it on the counter don’t you? but I knew they had already eating what ever we sold them so non and void from where I was standing ,no product no refund plain and simple! the way we looked at it was rob from the rich kids and give too the poor kids we all looked after each other if one got nicked and all his money went down the pan it was time for the get together. Get your fucking cash out or fuck off out of the outfit end of! A bit like a Robin Hood thing with out the maid Marianne, are maid was the local bar maid, at the end of the weekend and they got highly tipped after the count up. Then we started to up step the level getting fake pound notes to give as change tenners and fivers the only thing that was proper in our outfit was the queen’s head, we used to land on the site and buy the tickets for the first day, buy and sell them and we used to make a grand on the gate the ticket touts used too get the right hump but if anyone said a whisper we made sure it was there last as well as taxing there money and tickets, not even a moody drug passed then after we generated enough doe we used to send the driver with the cash to load up with lager out with the spud trolley and straight into the festival. The lager which was Stella act a twat cost twenty nicker a crate so a score for twenty four was good especially when we sold it inside the gaff for two quid a can or three for a fiver so each crate you would double the money and it was never us that went to get them only the driver had to restock, so in the daytime when we could not operate like we done in the night time we made cash that way. There was one time in Glastonbury and as we were getting short and everyone was watching the main bands on the main stages there was us! two of the outfit used two do the tents in the gaff slowly unzipping the tents for beer that the festivals goers had brought with them only to resell again and if the people were inside we used to act like we were selling the drugs and give them the offer of the wares the fake goods we had on us so it never came on top till one time I unzipped this tent and as I stuck me head in .lo and behold there was this hippy cunt shagging his bird ,I nearly fell on them out of shock, sorry pal I said do any of you two want any acid, speed or E..s as my cover! Now could you imagine the state of shock as the fellow jumped out his tent full naked ,hard on sticking out his body and me in stitches of laughter ,now what he had in his hand was a hammer not a ballpoint but a rubber mallet you would knock the tent pegs into the ground with and as he swung for me I moved to one side not getting hit but not taking the issue as serious as I should of ,chasing me round the tent like two school kids playing kiss chase but only he did not want to kiss me far from it ,this went on for around ten minutes me ducking ,bobbing and weaving around the tents and in the background me pal Gary may fell to the floor with fits of laughter as I’m being chased by a man which looked like a white version of Bob Marley with a hammer and a fucking erection, what that must of looked liked must have been hilarious! Then he turned on Gary and he was on his toes as well! Now I’m on the floor crumpled up in fits myself as this lunatic is chasing me pal now and me mate could of knocked him spark out and he was more than capable but the thoughts of a geezer coming at yer starker with his mutton dagger pointing at you even gave him the chills this went on for nearly ten to fifteen minutes and as it came to ahead and he fucked off back in the tent, Timmy fucking mallet eat yer heart out! Now not only was this a great money spinner it was a great time ,I mean there aint many people out there than can say they have done Glastonbury twelve times so the bands and the sites I’ve seen, well I can honestly say it was normally a good experience apart from when it was pissing down and you were knee deep in mud trying to make a shilling sometimes felt demoralising after a day or two ,you always had to be on the move so wading through mud knee deep was an exercise in it..s self fuck knows how the army lads done it ,fair play to them cos after the festival I couldn’t walk properly for a week or so and they must of done that sort of shit all the time with back packs on ,so on that one I’ll stop complaining ,apart from when you would fancy watching a band or we would do a beer tent because the rain was two heavy we were on the move, plus the more people you had in the beer tent the easier it was to cut and not get spotted by the security or drugs squad even if you did get caught you only ever got charged with going equipped to cheat if they proved that you were selling them, nine times out of ten they swolled it that you found the bag ,lock you up in a mobile cell on the festival grounds test them then the door would open with some dozy looking copper and say they came up negative and let you go, how good was that? Webby me pal weren’t that lucky well he had had his coller felt fifteen or more times ,he only sold them to a undercover cop, Rastafarian bird as well ,boy she did look the part as well! I would have served her and that’s for sure but the thing with webby was that the more he drunk the less aware of what was going on around him, Glastonbury was only lawless to a degree the more drunk he got the louder you could hear his sales pitch so for any security passing by it didn’t take a genius to work out what was going to happen next, webby was good but slowly lost his touch of magic lets just say he was as sharp as a razor but he only had a throw away one so the more it got used the blunter it became, rather than wait to start cutting when it went dark he’ll get brave and start it when the drink took effect in broad daylight while the rest of us were selling the lagers which looked alright for it was only cover and when a beer got sold so did a acid tab or a pill if you know what I mean, I’m not saying for one minute he wasn’t good at what he done just to blatant . it happened at reading festival the same Rasta bird only went and purchased off webby again, poor old webb was to pissed to see it coming, banged up for the whole weekend, court Monday morning no getting out with that one selling to the same bird twice in two month’s so the judge stuck twelve month up his bottle, bullindon jail! do not get two hundred pounds for passing go and no get out of jail card here, now he was the only cutter I have herd of getting jail, even the other outfits that worked the circuit, you had another London firm all coloured chaps ,the Birmingham firm that was a mix and the Liverpool firm that was all white and around forty handed they were more into the tent raiding than the rest of them and good at it, we never ever had a tent talking about that we just used to un peg a normal looking tent that looked the same as the rest and take it two fields away and peg it back up, unless you had a tracking device on the thing there was no chance off spotting it ,even Morse and Agatha Christi couldn’t find that tent so what chance had a drugged up hippy of finding it? the good thing about having the other firms there was if you sold out of anything or got nicked and let out, they used to chip in and give whoever ten each like it was nothing out of there pocket so you soon had a hundred odd e..s back on board and if you had your parcel confiscated we all helped each other like a big family you know who you are so no name dropping here just a big thanks chaps… it never took long to get to know who’s who as you gathered around the same place in each event ,the dance tent! as soon as it was like dusk and the lights were dulling, like vampires of the night we appeared one outfit then the next till we were standing around ten foot away from each other in a semi circle around the dance tent like bloodsuckers but it weren’t there blood we wanted it was what they had in there pocket, the money! Music jumping and the base starts pumping they were coming at you like a animal stampede, see what it was the dance tent never started till seven so it was like a rush of people coming at yer half past six onwards well it was thick with people till around nine and there was us like a load of wicket keepers in a line ready for the first strike TRIPS,E..S ,SPEED OR WEED like a little rhyme we even said it to the beat of the music in time synchronised to the background, standing there while bobbing yer head and pretending to look wasted so it looked more than believable to the revellers of the night. For people who read this that have actually been done and think were no good con men maybe we were but no one died on I’ll stuff I knew what was in and I was more than happy to sell it! so the way I looked at it I was doing yer a favour end off no heavy bad reactions on are gear far from it and sometimes just so I looked like I was off me head these ravers used to ask what you had and thought it was great conversation to tell you what they had taken only to be bamboozled by my charm in to swapping a few of mine for there’s, now the only reason I done this was 1: I had to stay up all-night doing this! 2: I had to look the part because the more out of it you looked the easy it was to convince them they were proper 3: it was a festival and fuck it they didn’t cost me a penny and the more charged up I got the more drink I could do without getting off balance and not being able to work. Every now and then we would take a new person with us or two why I don’t know it must be the way we used to come back with the money and the flashiness of the money we had? This was always between two and three grand a hit each so from an outsider looking in it must of looked easy but with cutting you cut it or you don’t no slackers or fuck ups, so I’ve decided to bring salty and big al along and it’s crunch day ,the day before Glastonbury and my dinning room was more like a workshop every one finishing of the touches but there were no time to make anymore proper pills for these two nuts so we done it the old fashion way sent them to boots the chemist for Actifed which was decongestants ,great if you got a cold and they tasted fucking terrible, it what we used to crush down for speed or file them down for ecstasy pills then use the powder you filed off for the wraps of whiz, I mean they said they wanted to come four days prior we were making the Mitsubishis up for nearly a week and now they have got to work these pills as white Calais, each one of us apart from the little and large show had nearly seven hundred Mitsubishis each on us but not these two, forty eight a piece they were carrying as the packs came in twenty fours, well looking back at it I was init for the money they just wanted a free weekend! Plus more the merrier well at least it felt that way but let me tell you this two many cooks spoil the broth and you all know that one only to well? Now Gary may was coming along as well, this man had more tolerates than any fellow I knew, he went from chap to smack head, to chap to crack head and back again to a chap how I don’t know but he had the knack of never going down the pan to much, now this man was a total chap when it came down to the cut even when the cut was dead and buried he would always make triple than the average working class! one way or another ,he always sold this or that and was a right clever fucker, he had more resistance to drugs than van Morrison standing in front of a catholic audience plus had more charm than Michael Cane out of alfie surrounded by forty virgins now with the birds around the manor he had this almighty knack he would overcome near enough any bird and I mean any bird in a set of knickers for some ungodly reason they loved the cunt, right good looking cunt as well the birds in the day used to fall for his old bollocks ,my good looks and his old balls so with this mans charm and my wit we went along way to say the least from lands end to john o groats we had it, there weren’t one fellow that could give it large when us two were around and to top it off everyone that was a outsider thought we were brothers by the way we acted so cutting became to easy as we bounced off each other splitting every little pound note we had which felt right and when I was skint so was Gary coz it always took two too tango and we fucking fox trotted along sharing along the lines but as the years went on so did the women and slowly but surely we faded as life does from the only feet you stand on! we both fell in love as well as lee and even webby got left behind as if the cut weren’t a wank in the dark webby plus daimio couldn’t handle the real life when we all grew up they always looked at life as the cut and when it faded so did the outfit and the way I looked at it the past was the past you couldn’t have the same government in number ten forever so once in a blue moon they stepped down just like us lot! Only to let the young team be up and coming to let the youth rise there heads just as we once did...But still never had the same mark as we did in the register fucking puppy’s jumping and pissing all over the place

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