Dr. Roboto - ProfilesArchive

About Me

Beyond what's listed below, you want to know something about me, ask me. You want me to know something about you, tell me. No secret recipe to communication. Anyway here are my lists...STUFF I LIKE: learning new words; going anywhere tools are sold; grappling; ice cream "samiches"; woodworking; helping people move; my family; aquiring new skills; feeling sore; good beer; my awesome dog, Capone; getting flowers; backscratchers; quick wit; "Most Extreme Elimination Challenge"; subtle jokes that take a while to get; snowforts; hearing foreign colloquialisms translated literally, countdowns; coconut with lime and chili powder; the smell of new shoes and new tires; stories about man vs. nature; weird food; before-and-after; lame-ass, 80s butt-rock music; sleeping in on a workday; getting up early on a weekend; people who are smart but never tell you how smart they are; and people who have the intagible "IT."STUFF I DON'T LIKE: Mosquitoes; clowns; noticeing taht somthing is misspeled atfer I prnit or sumbit it; crappy handshakes; the fact that "phonetic" is not; disrespect; when women shave their eyebrows so that they can draw them back on in the wrong place; cheap-ass toilet paper; betty boop and people mimicking her disgusting voice, it's not cute, it's fucking annoying; helping people pack; rabid sports fans; the word "soggy" (go ahead and say it aloud 10 times, you'll see what I mean); arrogance; lazy people; hypocrites; religious zealots; an unwillingness to completely dry your hands after washing them in the bathroom and then shaking my hand after you come out leaving me to wonder what the wetness is from; people who are stupid assholes; bubonic plague; Roman numerals; graffiti, shitty drivers.

My Interests

I'd like to meet:

Disclaimer: I won't add anyone as a friend unless I get a message from that person. Friend requests from strangers without a hello are tossed.That said, I would like to meet people all over the world. I plan on visiting many countries over the next couple years and I would like to at least know one person in each country I travel to. Mostly I just want to find people who are willing to exchange information with me or just humor me by answering my remedial questions. Less vauge than that, I want to meet: good people, fun people, respectful people, and if you are all three... bonus!I avoid morons, stoics, and super-ultra-heartless-right-wing-conservative-christian-repu blicans, uppity bitches.... oh and crazy people (not like "I closed down three bars last night" crazy; I mean I avoid "I want to eat your face" kind of crazy)... Oh and this genius:

My Blog

Ridiculous Terminology #29: "Ass-less Chaps"

Whats the deal with ass-less" chaps? Why do people feel the need to throw in the term ass-less? Chaps are ass-less! Thats like saying two-wheeled bicycle or stupid musicalits implied. I don...
Posted by on Fri, 15 May 2009 13:26:00 GMT

The Case of The Purple Prince

Im going to work. Clean this damn place up! his roommate barked from inside his lame-ass Gap uniform as he pushed the week-old, half-empty box of pizza off of the coffee table. He opened the door a...
Posted by on Wed, 29 Apr 2009 16:40:00 GMT

Seven Blocks With Michael Jackson

It was one of the most interesting short walk Ive ever taken. Only seven blocks but wow, how it changed how I thought about the world.About three months prior to my walk, my co-worker had received fr...
Posted by on Tue, 28 Apr 2009 21:28:00 GMT

Insanity and the Incomplete Lunch

Today I had a sandwich in my luncha sandwich that almost drove me insane.I had a couple pieces of meat in my humble sandwichthree pieces to be exact. The last three cuts left over from last nights ...
Posted by on Sat, 04 Apr 2009 10:01:00 GMT

Boiling Water

I dont understand why people say a watched pot never boils. I watched a pot of water boil the other day. Though, it did seem to take a super long timeprobably because the whole time I was standing...
Posted by on Wed, 01 Apr 2009 20:37:00 GMT

Synchronicity

I try as often as I remember to look up words and phrases that I dont know. Often they are words or colloquilisms that I have heard a couple of timesenough to register my ignorance. Im sure Ive he...
Posted by on Mon, 16 Mar 2009 21:33:00 GMT

IT’S ALL RELATIVE

Dario took strange pleasure in listening to someone who had absolutely no idea what he was talking about. He never called them out on their shit. He just smiled and nodded. There's such a simple pleas...
Posted by on Sat, 03 Jan 2009 23:45:00 GMT

Ill just hold it. Whats the worst that could happen?

It's funny how it creeps up on you. It happens all the time but it only affects you if it's about to happen at the most inopportune timein a meeting, in a crowded elevator, worst of all, on a date. T...
Posted by on Mon, 15 Dec 2008 18:50:00 GMT

Took Me Long Enough

Well, I finally made it& I am debt free!*I officially have no credit card debt, no school loans, no car payments, no store cards, no membership fees for old lady porn sites (I always find ways of gett...
Posted by on Tue, 02 Dec 2008 18:40:00 GMT

Menudo

Sitting quietly at a restaurant counter in Albuquerque, a man turns to his friend seated beside him, "Hey, do you like menudo?" he asks casually.His friend finishes his gulp of beer and returns the gl...
Posted by on Tue, 25 Nov 2008 22:33:00 GMT