Spritney Beers - ProfilesArchive

About Me

Myspace Graphics
Myspace Layouts MY NAME IS KELLIE, AND I'M PROGRAMMED TO BE AWESOME. I ENJOY ROMANTIC DINNERS, LONG WALKS ON THE BEACH AND POKING DEAD THINGS WITH STICKS. I'VE RECENTLY DISCOVERED A GHOST IN MY HOUSE WHOM I HAVE AFFECTIONATELY NAMED "SCARY LARRY". I AM (IN NO PARTICULAR ORDER) A GREAT DRIVER, A TERRIBLE SPELLER, A MEDIOCRE SINGER, INSURANCE AGENT, AVID FRENCH FRY ENTHUSIAST, HEAVY DRINKER, 420 LOVER AND GENERALLY WELL LIKED.

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adopt your own virtual pet! .. ..
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My Interests

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YOU MIGHT BE LIKE SPRITNEY IF...
1)If you've ever thought a chigger was a racial slur you might be like Spritney.
2)If you think the "no fuel" light in your car is simply a suggestion you might be like Spritney.
3)If you own more TV remotes than you do pairs of underpants you might be like Spritney.
4)If you've ever blamed the dog for your own fart you might be like Spritney.
5)If you've ever referred to the things on top of a deer's head as "horntlers" you might be like Spritney.
6)If you watched Elliott Sadler fall off the stage in Charlotte and laughed BEFORE you knew he was okay you might be like Spritney.
7)If you were walking down the aisle at your wedding and realized "Oh crap, I forgot to put my shoes on!" you might be like Spritney.
8)If you've ever been accused of badly impersonating a redneck when you speak you might be like Spritney.
9)If you consider "dressing up" putting on your skinny jeans and wearing a pair of earrings and/or necklace you might be like Spritney.
10)If you give everyone you meet a gangsta nickname you might be like Spritney.
11)If you've ever run over a mailbox while attempting to kill a fly in your car you might be like Spritney.
12)If your boss was complaining about the heat being turned up and you accidentally offered to "blow him" instead of "blow ON him" you might be like Spritney.
13)If you've ever asked the Waffle House waitress what they had "on tap" you might be like Spritney.
14)If you've ever sang outloud the words to "Tubthumping" as you're strapped onto an immobilization board after being run over by a car you might be like Spritney.
15) If your Christmas tree was still standing on Valentine's Day you might be like Spritney.
16)If you've ever found your lost car keys in the dishwasher you might be like Spritney.
BEFORE THE JAGERMEISTER KICKS IN

...AND AFTER
.......
THE LITTLE SISTER I NEVER HAD. MEET MISS DAKOTA. SHE'S CURRENTLY IN THE "COLLI PAHK" GANGSTER TRAINING PROGRAM

... I DANCE ON BARS BECAUSE I'M COOLER THAN YOU
...

I'd like to meet:

Reynaldo Lapuz. Songwriter extrodainaire. THIS GUY...WHAT A HOTTIE!!

Music:

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Otis Redding was a musical genius

I'm down with the PSYKNESS.

Movies:

.. Pulp Fiction is the best movie ever made. Hands down... Other favorites include...

My Blog

Friday!!! Everyone who wants to go needs to read this...

Sex And The City: THE MOVIE!! We've been waiting 4 years, now it's only 2 days away! This is the plan, so ladies (and guys who aren't ashamed to admit they liked the show) let's get ready! Meet at Reg...
Posted by Spritney Beers on Wed, 28 May 2008 12:12:00 PST

Because it’s impossible to sleep

I can't sleep alone :o[ So Ive been cruising myspace and looking at profiles of all my friends and thinking about all the fun times we had together and a few stick out incredibly... * Contemplating st...
Posted by Spritney Beers on Wed, 21 May 2008 12:32:00 PST

M tothe I (squared)

I think you are one awesome ass betch. I cannot wait to be in The Indianners playing guitar hero, watching t-ball, drinking many mojitos in foldable lawn chairs and making Halpert chase the invisble b...
Posted by Spritney Beers on Thu, 08 May 2008 06:19:00 PST

An open letter to Shirley Phelps

Okay, so I was talking with a friend of mine tonight, and I’m not quite sure how we got on the subject, but it was the first time I’d heard of the Westboro Baptist Church and it’s le...
Posted by Spritney Beers on Wed, 09 Apr 2008 11:29:00 PST

Hanish Vance (I swear to God thats actually a real name)

Okay, so I check my inbox a few minutes ago and I get a message from a douchebag calling himself Hanish Vance, basically calling me dumb because I don’t like Barack Obama and chose to post a bul...
Posted by Spritney Beers on Thu, 06 Mar 2008 08:52:00 PST

A Young Soul

Those of you who know me, know I'm not the overly religious type. But I read Heather's blog a while ago and it made me start to think. What are my views on religion, and life and death, and all that s...
Posted by Spritney Beers on Wed, 20 Feb 2008 02:53:00 PST

Just some random crap I thought of today

1. If you’re old and can barely walk as it is, why would you try to manuever up a flight of steps at your insurance agency, with your cane, while holding a half full can of Pepsi in your free h...
Posted by Spritney Beers on Mon, 18 Feb 2008 02:14:00 PST

DIPLOMACY (Blog is now closed. Stop stalking me!)

OKAY, SO THE SITUATION IS THIS. A FRIEND OF MINE WAS HAVING A CONVERSATION TONIGHT WITH ANOTHER OF OUR MUTUTAL FRIENDS AT THE BAR OF A LOCAL NIGHTCLUB, WHEN THEIR CONVERSATION TURNED TO THE SUBJECT OF...
Posted by Spritney Beers on Sun, 07 Oct 2007 12:46:00 PST

BAR ETIQUETTE, BY YOURS TRULY

Lately I've noticed that when attending social gatherings, some of the younger people I've encountered seem to have forgotten basic bar etiquette. And when I say younger people I'm spea...
Posted by Spritney Beers on Wed, 29 Aug 2007 04:48:00 PST

Hitting The Reset Button

As you all know I hardly ever blog, but sometimes you just have to get things off your chest. So....without further adue.... 1. I've noticed lately that alot of people are talking behind each other's ...
Posted by Spritney Beers on Wed, 25 Jul 2007 09:03:00 PST