Conceptual Shield

Raised on a pink raft floating on the river Styx, a sad boy with but a handfull of magic and a crescent-shaped birthmark appeared in Houston, Texas...the armpit of the USA. Armed with only a handful of guitars and a sparse collection of antique amplifiers he set forward in motion to attract the lowest lifeforms he could....through song. His name was Ralphie, he changed his name to Arthur to appear more relevant. A dozen or so songs in he heard a voice challenging his wit and musicianship...the voice sounded like an angry black woman....none other than Medusa! The gorgon danced about through every session howling like a snake and singing like some kind of retarded fag. The power quit, mist sprang from the shallow depths and Arthur saw himself surrounded by good-looking reptiles (some even amphibious).....he drank from the dark waters of the Nile and then sicked himself on the rocks of the fireball sun......what a year it was for BURNING! Alas, his human wings became broken as he slept by the side of a lion. The lion woke him with wandering nonsense and then he fell into an even deeper sleep from which he has never awoken to this day. BE WARNED.