I think my perfect dinner/dance party would take place in jazz heaven and include me, Bill Murray, Tina Fey, Jonathan Richman, the cast of Arrested Development, an orangutan, Catherine Keener, August Strindberg & Helium, Dr. Teeth and The Electric Mayhem, Will Ferrell, Ira Glass, an Al Gore Vidal hybrid (with Sassoon hair products & jeans), Cat Stevens, Richard Burton, The New Pornographers, my boyfriend, Lily Tomlin, Malkovich, all my friends past and present, my high school drama coach, Marcel Marceau, my cat, The Sedaris Family (including The Rooster), Alec Baldwin (but not his brothers), Jemaine and Bret, Bill Moyers, Gilda Radner, Gene Wilder, Woody Allen, Steve Martin, Madeline Khan, Bernadette Peters, OLD Judy Garland, Sydney Pollack, Pauline Kael, Lee Krasner, Meryl Streep, John C. Reilly, Barbara Streisand, Liza with a Z, Miles Davis, Yo La Tengo, Stephen Merritt and Claudia Gonson, Waylon Willie and the Boys, Dolly Parton, my childhood dog Rocky who was given to a "sick boy in the country" while I was away at my grandma's one summer, Mrs. Garrett, plus special guests and various artists. I'd probably pee my pants on the way there and would be tardy cause I couldn't think of a good excuse as to why I came to my dream dinner/dance party in jazz heaven wearing peed in pants. Some dreams shouldn't come true.* I would also like to extend this invitation to the Spurs starting line-up, the Dalai Lama, M.I.A., Barack Obama, and Winslow Homer. RSVP's accepted until we meet in heaven.