First off,I'm kind of a big deal. People know me. I'm pretty much the coolest guy I know. I'm not fat, I'm festively plump(ok, fat).I'm addicted to food and women,(mostly covered in chocolate on both)If I was skinny,I'd be more of an asshole...but that won't happen in this lifetime.I am pear shaped, so I don't wear light green clothes or act juicy. I like to take pictures with a digital camera so I can look back at my life instantly. I love to tell jokes. Sometimes they are funny, other times, ah not so much. I moved from Oklahoma to Vegas in '97.LAS VEGAS(where hope goes to get raped) Do you know what's fun to do in Oklahoma? Pack up your shit and move! There is nothing there! IT WAS INVENTED BEFORE FUN! It's not as bad as I let on. I met some really great cowgirls out there. Don't mess with Texas, it's not nice to pick on retards. If you don't know me and are lucky to meet me one day, I'll tell you about the time I used to DJ at a bar in Oklahoma (shitty story).When you laugh, the world laughs with you. When you cry, it's because you sat on your balls. There are two things I look for in a woman - a pulse and no COCK (pulse optional).Two great sensations,eating and sex, but a doughnut dosen't charge 200$ an hour! I make decisions using 3 things my gut, my heart, and my head.Usually my gut talks my heart and head into another piece of fudge! Also, If you say "I'm really good at checkers", it's the same as saying "I'm really not good at alot of things". The end of an eating contest is the start of a shitting contest...those hot dogs gotta exit! The good things that come to those who wait are usually what's left from those who got there first! I hardly ever go swimming, mostly because it's never been a half hour since I last ate! When drinking, remember: Pants down - Then shit.But mostly it's all about love and a good time so let's all have a real good time.... MySpace Layouts at TweakYourPage.com
