The Dirty Quaints are a group of amazing individuals who have been playing music since before the beginning of time, although it wasn't until recent events in Paris that they were able to discover the existence of each other. All visiting independently, and coincidentally taking the same tour of the legendary catacombs, The Quaints encountered a pocket of zombies that ate and devoured every last tourist in the group. The Quaints, armed only with their guitars, microphones, and drumsticks fought back in the dark tunnels. Kip and Andrew stood back to back swinging their guitars into the soft zombies' skulls with skills to match the best swordsmen, while Nick stood on his own striking with crushing blows to match that of Mighty Thor the thunder god. Jon quickly insulted each until they killed themselves in depression that the only dead could suffer. Finally Dani thrust out with her drumsticks, piercing through the undead's eye sockets and into their brains, twisting her wrist to scrambles their brains. With every last ghoul destroyed, they decided that they needed to share their awesomeness with the world, and since Dani had been able to prove her skills beyond that of mere mortal women, the Men decided she was worthy to join them in their campaign to rule the world.
Next Stop for the Quaints was Romania where, after short a highly successful revolution that is taught to freedom fighters and terrorist around the world to this day, they established their current headquarters. Despite the long flights, they mostly enjoy spreading their powers in and around Asheville North Carolina of the United States, being home country of most of the band members.
