Mr.Tibbs - The dirty cousin

I was raised in the suburbs of Greenland for the 1st 12 yrs of my life. After making it out of the slums of Hoelingandergraad, where constant turf wars and a street economy fueled by the sale of prescription Zoloft have plumeted the city into a state of death and destruction, I moved to Wichita, Kansas. In Wichita I used the rough and tumble skills I learned in Hoelingandergraad to make it as the lead flutist in a Goth Metal band named N.W.A.B (Niggaz Wearing All Black). During a performance at Cleophus' Classy Bar & Grill a recruiter from Kansas State liked what I played and gave me a full musical scholarship to Kansas State U. After leading Kansas State to 2 consecutive Band Tournament titles and 3 NCAA basketball championships I graduated in 1986 with a degree in Chocolate Chip Design. Soon after I joined the Army and became part of many succesful missions such as the 341st Airborne infantry (aimed at assasinating Saddam in 1991) the 563rd Tank Division (responsible for apprehending Osama Bin Laden) and the 786th Mobile Infantry (which was supposed to find Iraqi WMD's before the 2003 invasio.....occupation of Iraq.)