You might be a fireman if...You have ever spent 10 min trying to force open a door only to have someone come along and open it by turning the handle.You have ever had a heated debate over the color of firetrucks.You take great joy in smashing the windows of a car parked in a fire zone or in front of a hydrant.You have ever played jingle bells at Xmas time on the air horns to clear traffic.Your kids are afraid to get into water fights with you.Your work gear makes you sound like Darth Vader.You might be a fireman if you've ever said, "she's hot tonight" and not been talking about a girl.You might be a firefighter if you've ever smoked and there wasn't a cigarette in sight.You might be a firefighter if "climbing the corporate ladder" has nothing to do with career advancement.You might be a firefighter if the microwave goes off and you run out of the house thinking it was your pager.You know you're a firefighter when you really think that rusty old hydrant looks good in the garden.You might be a firefighter if you had to extricate someone by cutting the car doors off on one side and realized there was nothing wrong with the doors on the other side.