Dr. Kenneth Noisewater profile picture

Dr. Kenneth Noisewater

I am here for Friends and Networking

About Me

I really like to cuddle, which is kinda gay, but oh well. Despite my normal sarcastic tone, I can be refreshingly optimistic at times. I love California, but feel like I need to get out of here and probably will do so in the near future. I would give up anything for a Cheryl David or Pam Beesley of my own. I like to think. I think its cute when girls act frustrated when the guy won't let them pay. "Everlong" by the Foo Fighters is my favorite song of all time; hence I enjoy listening to it. I enjoy subtle, intelligent types of humor. I love whistling; if i could do this professionally I guarantee I'd be star. I like golf. I think the sexiest thing about a woman other than a nice smile is the small of her back. I appreciate good, elaborate onomatopoeia. I like not showing people my true self and not letting too many people in close to me. I cannot stand conceited girls, no matter how pretty they are. I love playing my guitar. I am deathly afraid of oppossums; heights, cool... snakes, no problem... anything that would normally scare a rational person, I'm usually fine with, but opposums, wow. I like giving kisses on the forehead. I enjoy pre-gaming with some power ballads via Rock Band with the new roomies. I like poker. Few things in life make me feel better than knowing I made the right decision with a large amount of pressure on me whether it be to fold or raise. For some strange reason I thoroughly and enjoy the immaturity and drama that is Laguna Beach and The Hills. Positivity is is a trait that I truly appreciate. I can't stand it when people say they enjoy having intellectual conversations but mis-spell words in that same phrase. I like girls who look better when they first wake up. I like the feeling of new socks. I am hard on myself and don't understand any other way of living. I like large vocabularies. I appreciate honesty, brutal or not. Game shows for some reason intrigue me. I secretly like it when girls take a long time to get ready. I like every once in a while a good chick flick. I like good manners. I am a fan of mean-spirited humor, its more fun that way. I like girls who are lady-like about 80% of the time. I like, and truly appreciate considerate people. I like the Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles. I like acting cocky although thats mostly what it is... an act. I like kissing necks, backs, and collar bones. I like playing beer pong. I like walking a plush, green golf course in 80 degree weather with a light, consistent breeze. I like going to trashy Indian casinos with Gabe. I like being romantic. I like watching Seinfeld; its so funny on every layer of humor and the more you think about each strange situation, its even funnier. I like saying exactly what is on my mind and cannot stand it when people do the opposite with me. I like eating at restaurants. I like friendly and/or not-so friendly shit-talking. I like it when girls wear glasses and/or scarves. I like ordering simple foods at high-maintenance restaurants. I like learning about economics, philosophy and finance. I like playing the piano. I like being a gentleman. I like basketball; I like the feeling of not being able to miss, fundamentally sound bounce passes and blocking shots. I actually enjoy the taste of beer. I like listening to music which reflects my current mood. There are times where music with a deep message is extrememly powerful yet sometimes I just like listening to songs that have absolutely no insight or deeper meaning behind them. I like driving stick-shifts. I like Jim Carrey movies. I like playing beer pong. I like capture the flag. I like driving Monica's mustang (even though it can't handle the Civy-Civ). I like taking naps. I love and truly miss my little sister; there's never been a more free-spirited and genuine little girl. I like calculating pot odds. I like referring to my penis as "the drill." I like going out on dates. I enjoy life no more than at the point when I have just worn off a bad hangover. I like looking at old pictures of my mother. I like buffalo wings. I want to be able to love someone the way I once did but I'm not sure if I have that in me anymore. I like dressing up because it makes me feel confident. I like knowing the right answer. I enjoy watching Ray Allen shoot a basketball and Tiger Woods swing a golf club. I like feel-good stories only in moderation. Call me "emo" if you like, but I love expressing every feeling I have no matter when/where i have it. I like listening to Howard Stern. I like Republicans, i like Democrats, but nothing radically on either side. I like open-minded people even though I could always use to be moreso myself. I like and find the most humor in astute, observations about common life occurences. I like wearing my whiteboy, Tom Cruise Top Gun stunna shades. I like heights, cliff-jumping and skydiving. I like walking barefoot in grass. I like making decisions using a combination of my head and my heart. I like getting drunk dials from Charles at 430am. I love kids. I like my mom and my dad although they're complete opposites. I want to get the most out of every moment and emotion evoked by life and enjoy that to the fullest extent possible.... Did I mention I love to cuddle?Phew, alrighty, now I leave you with a quote representative of me from one of my favorite movies, the question posed: What do you belive in?"Well, I believe in the soul, the cock, the pussy, the small of a woman's back, the hanging curve ball, high fiber, good scotch, that the novels of Susan Sontag are self-indulgent, overrated crap. I believe Lee Harvey Oswald acted alone. I believe there ought to be a constitutional amendment outlawing Astroturf and the designated hitter. I believe in the sweet spot, soft-core pornography, opening your presents Christmas morning rather than Christmas Eve and I believe in long, slow, deep, soft, wet kisses that last three days."

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My Interests

Beer gardening, Cougar hunting, Basketball, playing the guitar, poker, golf, investing and economics... Wow, i know.

I'd like to meet:

Richard Tait, Jerry Seinfeld, Warren Buffett, Martin Luther King Jr., Phil Hellmuth, Larry David, Howard Stern, Ben Stiller, Tiger Woods, Dave Grohl, Barry Bonds, Phil Ivey, Shannon Elizabeth, Daniel Negreanu, and Keira Slavin, I mean Knightley...

Music:

My ideal concert bill would look something a bit like this: John Legend, Incubus, Jack Johnson and the Foo Fighters. Dashboard Confessional, Eminem and Tim Mcgraw. Old school Snoop Dogg and Outkast and anything by Kanye West and Common.

Movies:

In no particular order: Crash, Boiler Room, Wall Street, Rounders, Closer, Tin Cup, World Trade Center, Caddyshack, Swingers, Rudy, Thank You For Smoking, The Kingdom, We Own the Night, Anchorman, Zoolander, 50 First Dates, Good Will Hunting, Dazed and Confused, Mallrats, Smokin Aces, The Shawshank Redemption, The Girl Next Door. Love Actually and A Walk to Remember because they appeal to my sensitive side. Badder Santa is absolutely hilarious; if you think this movie is funny we'll probably get along real well.

Television:

Sports in general, particularly Basketball and Golf, Poker, The Office , Curb, Laguna Beach and Seinfeld.

Books:

WSJ, Good to Great, The World is Flat

Heroes:

Tiger Woods, Jerry Seinfeld, Phil Hellmuth, Allen Iverson and my parents... and Sting: the music he makes, I don't listen to it, but the fact that he's making it. I respect that.

My Blog

Stereotypes and Racism in America's Sports...

Why is it that in professional basketball, if a fight breaks out the participants are labeled as "thugs," have their character under scrutiny and their actions are frowned upon by sports analysts and ...
Posted by Dr. Kenneth Noisewater on Sat, 19 Aug 2006 11:42:00 PST