I am a fucking machine fueled by the past
Memory's a memory until it's a fact
I can bury the hatchet and let some shit go
But I got too many grudges to hold!
Saw a lot of people die in the end
I never want to walk that road again
Now I will never give up
I don't want to have it all, I JUST WANT TO HAVE ENOUGH
What is "LOA G8K33P3R", you ask? It's commonly known as a GAMER TAG. Yes, I play video games .., when I have free time. Does this make me a geek? I don't care. For christ sakes you're looking at my MYSPACE PROFILE. Doesn't that make you a geek as well? Food for thought. But anyway, I play games in my free time. Shocking, I know. Rainbow Six:Vegas, Battlefield 2, Madden 07, NHL 07, Ghost Recon, and Gears Of War for the X-Box 360, and I also have a Sony PSP portable.
So, moving on, this is where you find out all about me. Actually, no. I don't find a need to divulge my life story to a million and one myspacer strangers. The info below and in the interest areas should be enough to tell you whether I'm interesting to you or not. I doubt people are that interested in the intricate details of my life. People, especially here, are far too narcissistic to even read past this first paragraph. The bottom line is this, I have nothing to hide, if you ask. If you're curious, ask me. It's really not a hard concept. I'm stubborn, jaded, opinionated, and sarcastic. If you don't have an open mind, we won't get along.
PAY CLOSE ATTENTION, because obviously people can't read!! I have one very important and strict rule regarding my friend list. If I send you a message or a comment and you can't find the common courtesy to acknowledge it, in some fashion, then you don't belong on my list. Especially if you added ME in the first place. You're not that fucking busy or important and you never will be, so get over yourself. If we don't at LEAST correspond here, you'll be deleted.
This is a site that just reinforces what I've told naive women for years.
http://www.laddertheory.com
QUOTES TO LIVE BY
"I have no idea why but some girls seem to think that when I meet them in person I wont notice that they put on 40 pounds since their last good picture." - Tucker Max
"As for your boyfriend, what kind of dumbass takes chain mail seriously? What if someone sent your genius boyfriend a list titled "26 ways to clothes-line your girlfriend"? What kind of gullible idiot takes that shit seriously?"- Maddox
"You're the living inspiration for what I never wanna be."-Godsmack
The ALL NEW Lamest Mistakes made on Myspace Profiles 1 - FAKE PICTURES/PROFILES/PERSONALITIES. Fake myspace people are getting out ofhand. It's getting to be the majority, now. These people that have pictures of people thatare CLEARLY not them. Put your real picture up, you fucking scumbag loser. If you're thatfucking ugly, crawl in a hole and die. If I can manage to get a halfway decent picture up,so can you. Even if it DOES take EXTENSIVE photoshop work. Most people on here have a goodselection of photos, but you always have that handful of jerkoffs that ruin the party. Notonly do you have loser with fake pictures, but now you have them with whole fake lives. Ican't stress how big of a loser you have to be, to create a fake life on myspace. Grow up,before I beat you about the head with a rusty tack hammer. One of the most stupid emothings going on now is these girls that post up pictures of themselves, just about naked,and put "yeah, I'm so ugly" in the description. Hey, you dumb twit, if you thought you wereso ugly, you wouldn't be posting half naked pictures of yourself on the internet. No onewill mistake your fake modesty for humility. They WILL, however, show everyone just what afake, self centered, neophyte you are.
2 - BACKGROUNDS. What is this fascination with stupid backgrounds that clash horriblywith the text? With some of these stupid profiles, you can't even read ANY text that'sthere. Do you even look at your profile after you're done adding the code? Hmmm, purpleswirly background, and purple text. How easy do you think it'll be to see all your worthlessbabble, folks? Less is more, stupid. PLAIN BACKGROUNDS! Anything more and you're just beingan idiot. Furthermore, don't even get me started on animated backgrounds. The biggest wasteof bandwidth and effort. Spare us. It's not cute, and no one finds it cool. It lags downyour page, and no one is going to sit and wait for your dumb ass background to load,retard.
3 - CHEAP SPARKLY/FLASHY/BLINKING CLIPART. The same as above. The more animated CRAP(and it IS crap, no matter what you think) you put up, the more it lags your shit down. It'snot cute. It's a huge annoyance, and makes your shit look cheap. Be original, and stopputting up the same lame crap that every other amateur on here uses. Lose it. You're justbecoming a free advertiser for the site that makes those dumb ass things. Anyone with anycommon sense knows that you're not original or even creative, becasue you use those stupidthings.
4 - PHOTO SIZES. Listen, no one needs to see full size pictures of each and everyband, celebrity or tv show you like. Seriously, No one cares. If you feel that youabsolutely have to add them, learn to resize the pictures, stupid ass. You can researchenough to add the code in the first place, but you can't figure out how to resize a picture?It's not rocket science, Einstein. We're not doing an examination, here. No one has to seeevery pimple on Jenna Jameson's ass. If it's not really her ass, I don't care. Text worksJUST fine. At least 50% of the people on here can read, although that may be giving them toomuch credit. The other 50% could use the practice.
5 - TEXT SIZE. SO, I keep my screen at high res (1024x768), so stuff that looks hugeon most screens looks small on mine. If I'm looking at your profile and only 2 lines fit onthe screen, you've gone grossly overboard. I'm going to assume that most people aren'tlegally blind, so you can stop with the outrageously huge, retarded text. The golden rule isthis: THE LESS SCROLLING, THE BETTER. Say it along with the class, now.
6 - QUIZZES. You are NOT 22% angel, dope, but you ARE 100% retarded. What a totalwaste of time. They prove nothing. If you think more guys are going to visit your profilebecause some generic .. quiz says you're 22% innocent, you're wrong. 99.99% of peopledon't even realize it's there. It's a waste of space, and once again, no one cares.
7 - FRIEND WHORING/BULLETIN WHORING. This is just getting foolish. Posting bulletinsevery day to get your friend count up, so you can feel cool. No one thinks you're cool justbecause you have 5,000 friends on myspace. It makes you look like a pathetic, beggingloser. You're not going to get some kind of fucking "I'm a big winner on myspace" award.You wouldn't even know 90% of them if you saw them on the street. So they aren't friends.Also, for the record, no one cares if you're bored. Stop posting bulletins about it. Ifyou THINK they do, you're a moron. Quit acting like you're 12.
OK, so, I've pretty much shown you why at least 90% of the profiles on here suck. Like it or not, it's the truth.