</Dan> - ProfilesArchive

About Me

I'll try to fill you in on some of the basics, but if you really want to know about me, the best way is to hang out in the zoo that is my place for a while.
The Skinny:
- I can fold a fitted sheet into a perfect square.
- When I can't sneeze, I think of what it must be like to be in a terrible car accident and that usually brings the sneeze on. Don't ask me why. I have a masochistic nose, I guess. (But please don't hit it.)
- Graduated from Va Tech (Go Hokies)
- I can move my ears, eyebrows and balls independently of one another.
- I hold a Top Secret security clearance with the U.S. Government. Seriously. But that and a dollar will get you a bag of chips in Richmond.
- Chances are good that I've heard every joke out there. Or at least the good ones.
- I can shave my face and head without looking in under ten minutes. If I had my way, I would only do it once every 3 or 4 weeks, though.
- I write a ton of stuff that I may never actually submit to anyone to get published, but am slowly coming around to pursuing a career in film.
The Meat:
I moved to Richmond in August of 2005 from the DC Metro area to be closer to family and find a slower pace of life. So far, it's been awesome, although I do miss some things about Northern Virginia that Richmond can't replace.
I'm one of the millions of I.T. worker bees that make it possible for other worker bees in their little worker hives to spend 40 hours a week browsing the internet. So the next time you check your Myspace page at work, remember to thank your IT worker bee.
With a little luck and a little money, I should be living in the Fan by the summer of 2007 in my own home. I'm turning into a home repair guru and actually look forward to buying a house that's in dire need of repair. Maybe all of me is masochistic.
This year, I just might submit one of the screenplays I've written to some one/thing/contest and see what happens. Sometimes, I think the writing is more for me than anyone else. It's a little like the excitement one gets from playing the lotto. Except that it takes much more time and work than just picking up a lotto ticket.
If you rolled up a nerd, an artist, a movie junkie, a video gamer, a writer, a bottom-rung intellectual, a bottle of Captain Morgan and a great friend - and then shaved the head of that amalgam - you'd have me. And a very dull razor. You'd have that, too.
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My Interests

..I've tried too many things and am still interested in too many things to list them all in one spot. Life is FULL of opportunity. Try everything and when you're done, write about it.

I'd like to meet:

Given that most people just want to get to know me to enjoy my money, private jet, sports cars, condos in Bermuda and Manhattan, I'd like to meet people who are all about having a good time by just hanging out, trying new things, staying true to the old things and doing absolutely nothing when the occasion calls for it.

Also, if you have a soft spot for terrible liars and compulsive teasers, I think you'd fit right in.

Bonus points:
if you can tease back
if you enjoy movies half as much as I do
if you can play a musical instrument (and enjoy it)
if you read on occasion - doesn't have to be 24/7, but you pick up a book every now and again
if you can name at least one favorite video game
if you're a Capt Morgan fan
if you have learned to laugh at life

And bonus points for being 1) nerdy, 2) artistic or 3) intellectual. If you have any combination of the 3, you all deserve shrines built in your honor.

FYI - The "Top 8" list is the worst Myspace invention ever. If you're not on here, it's because I keep a revolving list. Or because you owe me money.

Music:

Coldplay, Jeff Buckley, Aqualung, Keane, Pete Yorn, David Gray, BTE, Damien Rice, My brother Jon, David Gray, Death Cab, Counting Crows, Barenaked Ladies, Dave Matthews, Johnny Cash, Chopin, Strokes, Creeper Lagoon, John Mayer, Radiohead, Louis Armstrong, Otis Redding, RHCP, Sublime, Sam Cooke, Cake, Lifehouse, Patty Griffin, Patsy Cline, Bob Dylan - The list goes on... You really have to meet my family to understand.

Movies:

Now, THIS list could go on forever. Seriously, I watch a lot of my movies.

I'd like to tell you it's all to study writing screenplays, but... I do get a big kick out of it.

Television:

To be honest, I don't watch much television. Smallville and Heroes are the only shows I try to watch regularly. Flip This House is starting to become a necessity!

Books:

Anything by Kurt Vonnegut
Five People You Meet In Heaven - Mitch Albom
On Writing - Stephen King
Almost anything by Stephen King, now that I think of it...
LOTR Trilogy - Tolkien
Da Vinci Code - Dan Brown
Brave New World - Aldous Huxley
Catcher in the Rye - J.D. Salinger
Lullabye - Chuck Palahniuk Leviathan - Thomas Hobbes
The Prince - Niccolo Machiavelli
The Prince Charming: A Comedic Discourse on Love, Sex and Dating in the 21st Century as Interpreted by Niccolo Machiavelli - written by Yours Truly, if I ever get around to finishing it.

Heroes:

Stephen King comes to mind, right off the bat. Read On Writing to find out a little more about him. Awesome story.

Anyone who follows their dream with reckless abandon.

Anyone who still gives a damn about kindness and generosity.

Anyone who stands by what they believe unerringly.

Starbucks' baristas!

Charles MF Brogdon

Strong Bad

That's all I have, for the moment.

My Blog

Irony on wheels

I have the great fortune of passing six tolls on my round-trip voyage to work and back, five times a week, and like so many of you, I'm thankful to have my EZ-Pass/Smart Tag handle all toll-related ex...
Posted by </Dan> on Fri, 30 Nov 2007 02:11:00 PST

Goodbye, yellow brick road...

This is the last letter I will write in my twenties. I'm 20 minutes from my 30th birthday and reflecting on everything from my earliest memories to what I was doing ten minutes ago. It's ha...
Posted by </Dan> on Thu, 18 Oct 2007 08:58:00 PST

So it goes...

http://www.cnn.com/2007/SHOWBIZ/books/04/12/obit.vonnegut.ap /index.html?eref=rss_topstories When I was going through college, one of the books I was lucky enough to stumble upon was "Slaughterhouse Fi...
Posted by </Dan> on Sat, 14 Apr 2007 08:50:00 PST

Things to Know: aka How I Learned to Stop Worrying and Love the Farm

I woke up at 4am on Friday morning to drive around Richmond with my buddy Ryan and look for Easter Kegs (contest a local radio show was running) and while we were driving around, I heard a woman on th...
Posted by </Dan> on Sat, 07 Apr 2007 01:59:00 PST

For the Interior Decorator and Criminal in all of us...

I'd like to dedicate this blog to ice cream. I don't care that it's 30 degrees outside. Ice cream is still pretty damn good. To all you fair weather ice cream fans... you should be a...
Posted by </Dan> on Sat, 17 Feb 2007 12:18:00 PST

The Boy Who Cried Word

That's not really a suitable title because it bears no relevance to the content of this blog, but I don't think there really is a suitable title because it's been so long since I've put something up a...
Posted by </Dan> on Tue, 12 Dec 2006 10:12:00 PST

Weddings, Funerals, Birthdays and Contract Labor

It's been a while since I wrote a funny blog, but after the last few weeks and with the advice of a friend, I decided to write a blog that was a little more thoughtful than it was poignant. Mayb...
Posted by </Dan> on Mon, 30 Oct 2006 07:23:00 PST

Superman Returns

I wrote a blog about the power of film and the way it should be used as a tool with which to educate young and old generations - to pass on paradigms of the life worth living - and talked about how fi...
Posted by </Dan> on Fri, 30 Jun 2006 03:37:00 PST

Everyone send a shout out...

...to my sister Cinnamon and her kick-ass hubby Sookie. At 12:27 am this morning, Cinnamon gave birth to Azalea Grace, weighing in at 9 pounds, 3 ounces! I lost the baby weight pool we had going...
Posted by </Dan> on Wed, 07 Jun 2006 08:18:00 PST

You bet I do.

As I get older, the idea of marriage weighs a little heavier on my mind, but it also grows a little more distant as something that need not be done. I still doubt that I'm ready for marriage and...
Posted by </Dan> on Thu, 27 Apr 2006 11:54:00 PST