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From Kitsch derives the anti-life by which most of us live lives we are haunted by. I Quote Kundera for a quick explanation: "Kitsch causes two tears to flow in quick succession. The first tear says: How nice to see children running on the grass! The second tear says: How nice to be moved, together with all mankind, by children running on the grass! It is the second tear that makes kitsch kitsch." Wiki
It is within the second tear our minds detach from our lives and flies to a lofty perspective. She is free to acknowledge her heart or discount the very humanity that gave her life. She is free to discount shame.Shame enables Erotica. Shame makes relentless demands upon my heart to cover this flesh that could so readily be exposed and yet it is this very exposure that must be fulfilled. My lips are spared from shame. Lips are my most clever device as it passes secrets from eye to eye. I favor the subtlety of slight gestures that hint of invitation, but only because the art of subtle seduction is a necessary drama. Shame witnesses this drama ever ready to evict my ability to make use of my lips, always threatening to halt even the most common gestures, like my seeming natural ability to form my lips into Os and Ahs in anticipation of speech.
Should I pass a friend I need simply invoke the desire to greet him and words pour forth from these lips with natural composition and ease of expression. However, when my lips begin to court this vision of beauty standing beside me I must be clever to seduce both this girl with my coded expressions and charm the shame that is vigilantly on guard. The force which causes my lips to tease betrays itself to shame as the temperature rises in my cheeks and my heart quickens. Now I must act in character and mask my true intentions from shame.
Coded messages pass from eye to eye as these clever lips succeed in passing my secret invitation. The words that were spoken to my newly enlisted co-conspirator after the usual discourse concluded were simply, "I would love to show you one of the paintings I'm working on." And she was drawn into my conflict, a willing ally against shame.
Erotica is conquest, domination expressed through flesh. It is the surrounding glory that penetrates any common place after it has been transformed by those who would conspire against shame. Two characters, the ally and I, based on a queue predetermined by lips in advance press lips against lips in a sudden orgy of kisses. We throw off the guise we had been carefully acting out, and overwhelmed shame defenseless against the passion revealed by the flesh.
Without shame there would be no conquest. The shameless can exist in moments of great strength forged in Erotic exposure. Or because they have no sense of the power within themselves. A power that would enable them to be free of their endless anxiety inspired manipulations, to find more than the comfort provided in the influence over others. This shame has no meaning to them, as it has merged into the very fabric of their being. Instead of Erotica, these individuals would know only horror or indifference should they be faced with the possibility of exposing something true within themselves, rather withdrawing deeper into the character they play. But in this moment of horror and panic, displaced from the character she had been acting for longer than her memory provides reference, she may suddenly be confronted with true inner honesty.
She is confronted with the truth of herself with him by her side, witnessing together everything cruel and beautiful in the shadows and light. In this moment she knows in complete certainty that she is beautiful, and she draws him deeper.
- An open letter those who knew me less and everyone who deserves better..
