Simon. noun. lit. Shit of a God

About Me

i was born 7165 days ago.. give or take a day. to be more wholey accurate that was 174,832 hours ago taking it as 18:00 on the 17th April. within that time at least 459 of the hours have felt like a life time... but then if we take out from that what i have lost through sleep...time passing quickly while having fun unconciousness... hospital visits...because lets face it that is not living... its a kinda half limbo vegative state... thats another... 957 hours off my lifetime which takes me to 173,875. then theres the drug trips to factor in... time thickened to a kind of syrup that i've had to fight my way through... in fact at one point it became water that soley revolved around me... but i think i should discredit that as shortly after realising i controlled time i began to melt into the chair i was sat on ...and by a strange chain of events thats altready included in the hospital stay calculations... sooo i spent roughly 8 months stoned... possibly longer lets say 10 months... 6 of which where consecutive so let there time frame be tripled and the other four merely doubled that makes an extra 19,452 hours so thats a total of 193,327 hours or 695,977,200 seconds or 11,599,620 minutes. well obviosuly time has now past since 18.00 but meh. so now if smoking takes 5 minutes off your life... and i'd say i've smoked close to .... 4,000 cigarettes and two cigars so if we give cigars 3 minutes of your life... as they are less bad for you thats 20,006 minutes (1,200,120 seconds) what leaves me with 11,579,614 minutes or 192,993 hours 34 minutes 12 seconds. but the complete and utter irony of it all is i don't even like maths.

My Interests

I'd like to meet:

thats fairly presumptuous of the site... and vaguely discriminatory. i dunno people... and if there are any parrots or maybe the occassional gerbil browsing the internet they'd do too.

My Blog

tagged.. what ever the fuck that means

so.. i have to say 10 things that are intersting/quiky about me that you people don't know... i sy you people.. i assume this you people is going to be me re reading this for spelling errors and mayb...
Posted by on Sat, 01 Mar 2008 19:43:00 GMT

In search of reality

She leads me by the hand into a crumbling hotel. Her hand, clammy against mine, gripped tight, rough skin grinding against cold indifferent flesh. Cheap perfume drifts behind her; a musty river barely...
Posted by on Tue, 11 Sep 2007 09:23:00 GMT

The 10 Commandments for the 21st Century.

1. Thou shalt not worship any other gods before me. Unless you are willing to blow yourself up for them.2. Thou shalt not worship false idol. Unless you ring in to vote for them then worship all you w...
Posted by on Sun, 12 Aug 2007 05:00:00 GMT

cctv and mind control.. one governments attempt to fuck the youth up even more.

not being bable to sleep.. i was walkign my dog.. i got to the locl shopping prestinct.. my dog stopped to have a sniff.. so i was looking round.. itwas about 2am.. i noticed a very fast movement.. ou...
Posted by on Thu, 09 Aug 2007 10:50:00 GMT

web rant

i've just read some one's bulletin saying how the internet has opened up a gateway that allows you to connect with the world.. okay.. i do recognise that feeling.. it's the same one i had when i first...
Posted by on Sat, 04 Aug 2007 19:28:00 GMT

So.. once again Ive tried to be funny.../cat rant.

Except this time.. I've written it out as if it were a piece of stand up comedy...feed back and thoughts both positive and complimentary welcome :PIs it me or are cats the weirdest fucking house pet? ...
Posted by on Fri, 03 Aug 2007 18:04:00 GMT

this time the revoloution will be televised...

... in our new summer reality tv spectacular "this country's fucked up we need to get the politicians out of here!" join in week after week as our chosen few, selected through last months "revoloution...
Posted by on Thu, 28 Dec 2006 02:32:00 GMT

noam chomsky the musical

the combined effect of mockery and shame sprinkled with a pinch of salt makes baby jesus cry a river of saccrine tears this, i must stress, is nobodys fault it's just that jesus is a pussy who is scar...
Posted by on Tue, 09 May 2006 17:59:00 GMT

giraffes....

well apparantly i'm good at drama. i've got like a grant thing ...well i will have it if i get iunto a drama school. its weird i don't actually think i'm that good but yeah other people do who knows....
Posted by on Sun, 30 Apr 2006 09:11:00 GMT

Junction X

.. a cross roads has been reached, i assume, in some distant place for somethings had to change my friends to put a smile on my face. and indivdualist nightmare, just clones everywhere with tight fitt...
Posted by on Wed, 12 Apr 2006 13:34:00 GMT