34309424 - ProfilesArchive

About Me

Here are some things I believe. I believe that a guy should get a gift from a girl for popping the question. I believe that midgets make any situation funnier. I believe that "Sweet Child of Mine" should be the national anthem. I believe that you should have to take a civics test to be qualified to vote. I believe that running is not a sport, it's a punishment. I believe that you should be allowed to raise farm animals within the city limits. I believe that pizza is the most perfect food ever made. I believe there should be an actual town named "Funky Town", and that I should be the Mayor. I believe I have become addicted to those banner ad games on the net. I believe that we should start referring to the homeless as "hobos" once again. I believe I will add things to this list as I think of them. Never forget what a wise man from the WWF by the name of Ric Flair always said..."To be the man, you gotta beat the man."

My Interests

I'd like to meet:

If you wanna IM me on AOL, I'm nillagorilla1979

I am really hoping to meet a bisexual nymphomaniac pygmie with one arm and who walks with a limp because of her slight hunch. She should weigh anywhere from 200-350 lbs, and be excellent at karaoke. She should like long walks on the beach, holding hands, and doesn't mind me ruling her with an iron fist. Past gymnastics experience is a plus, but not a requirement as long as she can unhinge her jaw like a snake. She should be willing to give (and receive) massages, and not mind spending most of her time living in my closet while eating out of a dog dish. If that sounds like you, then you've met your match!

Seriously though, I am up for meeting girls or guys to hang out with. It would be cool to share some common interests, but as long as you know how to have a good time and you don't take yourself too seriously, we can get down. For the women, I am single right now, but not looking to jump into anything. I'm not ruling it out, I'm just saying that you won't have me standing on your lawn at 3 AM holding a boombox over my head playing Peter Gabriel songs.

My Blog

You wanted me back? Be careful what you wish for

Howdy fuckers, It's your good old Uncle Marco, back from the grave to ruin your day. I decided to come out of bloggy retirement due to the overwhelming number of people asking me to write a new ...
Posted by on Fri, 08 Aug 2008 02:34:00 GMT

A brief update on my condition

Some thoughts:My birthday was great. I went out the monday before it with some friends in Southern pines, then celebrated with my family on wednesday, and then went out in chapel hill friday nig...
Posted by on Sun, 09 Sep 2007 15:35:00 GMT

The Advice Guy, issue 1

Dear Advice Guy,An acquaintance of mine recently broke up with his girlfriend, which meant she was no longer in our loop of friends I normally go out with. One day, at work, I get into an awkward conv...
Posted by on Fri, 17 Aug 2007 16:59:00 GMT

Is the glass half full, or just gaping?

As you all well know by now, I think about some off the wall shit. Well, today I was thinking about genitalia. Not the first time, that's for sure.More specifically, I was thinking about h...
Posted by on Sat, 21 Jul 2007 15:55:00 GMT

A virtual tour of how awesome Albania is

Today I decided to do a little research on Albania. It turns out, Albania is a pretty sweet country.It's located just north of Greece, just east of Italy, and approximately 5,877 miles from my g...
Posted by on Sun, 10 Jun 2007 15:01:00 GMT

New show rocks Marco's socks off, and reveals his narcissism

I very rarely use the powers of this blog for good. Well, as of yet, I can count exactly zero times that anything positive has come from anything I have ever typed. But today I want to clu...
Posted by on Thu, 07 Jun 2007 23:22:00 GMT

This is why I'm hottttt

Sometimes I just have to step back and take note of the absurdity of my life. Here is a conversation I had tonight, at 4 am:Marco Principio: people either love meatloaf, or hate itMarco Principi...
Posted by on Sat, 28 Apr 2007 00:36:00 GMT

If one more person says "gun control", I'm gonna shoot everybody

On April 16th, as everyone knows, a tremendously tragic act of violence was carried out by a lone gunman on Virginia tech's campus. The word "gunman" is the key to that statement. There we...
Posted by on Sun, 22 Apr 2007 15:14:00 GMT

No one will care about this except for me

Most of you know by now that I am a complete woodworking geek. It's axiomatic to my personality. As such, I spend a lot of time obsessing over tools. It's kind of like how women obse...
Posted by on Sat, 24 Mar 2007 15:15:00 GMT

I couldn't have said this better myself

As a preface to the following, I did not write the article below. I found it as a posting on the Raleigh Craigslist under "rant and rave". It resounded with me personally, as I have run in...
Posted by on Thu, 15 Mar 2007 23:21:00 GMT