I love biology and science. Metal and techno. Plastic rainbow jewelry and camouflage.
My goals in life are similar to that of any other female; to have a successful, fast-paced, self-gratifying career and to be lifted from any and all dependence on the male gender....hahahahaha, no. But I'd like to be a wife and a mother someday. I'm tired of my last name and would prefer another...I seem to be at a point in time in my life where everything I could ever want seems to be right there for the taking, but it still, for some reason, seems impossible to grasp. I feel as if I'm in limbo...I'm not sure what I'm doing or if I'm ever going to get what I really want. When things seem too good to be true, they usually are...is this pessimism or realism? Until my future unfolds, I'll go to school. Earn a few degrees. And continue to perfect myself...I'll never be fully content with the way I am, as I'm very picky and there's always room for improvement.
I don't believe in god, in anything supernatural, or in anything not supported by observable evidence (as nobody should), and when I die, I am comforted in knowing that I will enter darkness and nothingness. I don't fear death; it actually sounds quite wonderful. But I love and cherish my life because I know this is my one and only chance at it. Millions of years of evolution through natural selection have made it possible for me to be here today. My genes are what matter and they have made a long and successful journey to this present point, and make me who I am. It's amazingly improbable that I even exist; that all of the possible genetic combinations joined in the exact way that they did, so that I, can enjoy this rare chance at life. Nothing happens for a reason and the individual has the power to make their life whatever they choose. I am fully responsible for my actions, no higher power is pulling strings. I answer to myself and to those around me. As this life is short, the most important thing to focus on are the relationships you have with the people around you. Treat them well, love them, and never take their presence for granted. Indulge in what you love, never pass up an opportunity, and lighten the fuck up! Just as important, EXAMINE YOUR WORLD!!!!! Ask questions! Ask why, ask how! Don't just listen to people, see for yourself! There is never an excuse for not thinking. Never stop learning, learn as much as you can. The rest of the animal kingdom wasn't as fortunate to have evolved such a sophisticated cerebral cortex, so please, appreciate it and use yours! All of this makes me sound like an optimist, but trust me. I am far from it. I just realize how precious my life really is. Life is random, stressful, chaotic, painful, and a lot of the time, just plain sucks. I really am antisocial, in the popular definition of the word. My close friends are who I am comfortable with and who I enjoy spending time with. Anybody else...no thanks. The only advice I can give is to live this life for yourself, because its your life . Not some made up diety's. Yours. Make the most of it. You can't go back, there are no second chances. There are no eternal punishments for your actions in this life. Skirting punishment is no reason to do good, and its no reason to not indulge in something unconventional...if you are hurting no one, it hurts no one. Then what is the taboo? If it doesn't concern you or affect you in any way, mind your own fucking business. I want you to be free, and to be able to live your life as you wish. All I ask is for the same respect. Life is short and this rare chance will be over all too soon. I am not going to waste my life and I hope that you don't waste yours.
Nothing that truly exists is beyond the scope of human understanding.
I am a reclusive, introverted individual. I generally like to be left alone. I am prone to depression and self-loathing and tend to be a bit of a procrastinator. I don't have much in the way of self confidence and for the most part feel worthless. I really am happy enough, I don't sulk or cry, I just exist, day in and day out, no different, no worse but no better. I used to believe in something, but now I believe in nothing.
I Love: Kyle Davis. Megan. Hillary!!!! (an awesome technician and an awesome female). The beautiful state of Colorado. Reading. Science, biology, chemistry and the field of medicine. Toxicology, anatomy and physiology. Geology and earth history. Dinosaurs! History, specifically that of Nazi Germany and World War II. The 1940s era. Baking. Pretty much all domestic activities. Vintage heels, nylon stockings and garter belts. Porn. Being petite and pale skinned. Black clothing. Being submissive. Fur coats. Eating animals. Canis Familiaris. Black, Bitter, Coffee. Dark chocolate, mint chocolate and cheesecake. Red wine and White Russians. The German language. Rhinestones. Vintage manicured nails. Snow, rain and thunder. Trips to Denver. Sleeping in. Dita von Teese. Tim Burton and Johnny Depp. Agent Provocateur. Christian Louboutin and Moschino shoes. MAC makeup. Jean Paul Gaultier. Opera and musicals. Atheist businessmen. French toast with butter and powdered sugar. Little Ollie’s, Red Robin and Zen Garden. Scarves and pea coats. Big sunglasses. Pearls. Dancing and being goofy. Red lipstick. Mythology and classic literature. Penn and Teller. Symphonies. Fetishes. Men in makeup. The Church. Electronic music. Metal. JTHM. BLACK. Anything glittery. James Bond (no woman can resist). Master Chief. Honey roasted peanuts. Gin Martinis. Sticky lipgloss. Longaberger Baskets. Velvet. Cupcakes. Anything covered in sprinkles. Everything pumpkin flavored. Blasphemy! Yelling at people from moving cars. Cereal!!! Earl Grey tea. Honey wheat pretzel twists! Books! Gin and tonic. Gin and tang. Gin in anything. Pixie stixs. Nerds. Sweetarts. Mini Golf. Cherry cordials. Hyenas, platypi, and shrews! Zoos and museums. My job and the people I work with. Bananas!!!! GLITTERBALLS.Glowsticks and blacklights. Pink fluffy blankets. Kyle's carpet :). Burt's Bees. Cotton candy.
I Hate: Depression. The sun. Females. Colds and general malaise. Religion. Bigots. People who feel that whats best for them, is best for everybody. Victimless "Crimes". PETA (fuck that organization and anybody that agrees with anything they say). Activists. Florida. People who are obese and do not care. Media and politics. Rap and its underlying culture. Heat and humidity. Improper usage of the English Language. Country music and ignorant hicks. Big fucking trucks. People who try to be something. “Artistic†People. Mac. New clothing that immediately falls apart. Being alone. The general ignorance of people. Sleep deprivation. Olives and celery. Veganism. Soy milk. Blind faith. Feeling inadequate. Fighting to be a priority. Kansas. Chapped lips. The over usage of minor authority. Sundays. How something on my car is always fucking up. Feminists. Infomercials. Anxiety. Feeling neglected. How easy it is for me to get motion sick. Anybody who claims to be a thug or a gansta'(fuck you). Stupid ass television shows that dumb the mind and waste your life. Angelina Jolie (WTF?), Kat Von Dee. Rose Mcgowan. Myspace photography pages!(having a camera and use of photoshop does not make you creative, talented or your "models" attractive). Anything biological that is bristly (internal bristles, not like a porcupine) or contains unnatural protrusions; Its the only thing that grosses me out and makes me act squeamish and girlie. Females in Metal bands (they don't belong there and it totally ruins it for me). Humans (as a rule of thumb, most humans suck). Having everything that I want in life just out of my reach. Bill O'Reilly (a whole, whole lot). Presidential election time. I will always be adding more.
I cannot think of anything else that is stronger evidence against the notion that this world was lovingly, and intelligently created.
There are some out there who wouldn't want scientists to bring one of THESE back to life!!! I mean, what the fuck!? Think of it as a reunion, since, you know, we lived alongside them only a few thousand years ago...