As much as I'd love to portray myself as some kind of amazing individual, most of that awe is just in my head. When you strip away all the daydreams and fantasies, I'm just a simple man, and nothing more.
I'm an artist, of sorts, a poet, musician, actor, dreamer, a complete drama king, living my life, as if I always have an audience. I do have a bit of an inferiority complex, though, derived from always finding someone better than me, at everything I do or have. I try to keep an open mind, to new ideas, and new experiences (and no, you sickos, that does NOT imply I'm looking for some new kind of sex!). Music, and emotion are my two biggest driving forces. That's right, I just admitted I live my life, by following my heart, and music surrounds my spirit, amplifying my feelings, for light or for dark.
I'm obsessed with the concepts of balance, honor, virtue, and nostalgia. The dark heroes, from stories were always my favorite, and I live my life, as if I were one of them. When I was young, I was always the outcast, the one they picked on and made fun of. That flame has forged me into what I am today; a self-styled "underdog hero", who now stands up for those little guys, like the one I used to be. Yet, I try to remain humble, knowing that foolish pride will only be my downfall. I find joy, reminiscing in my most cherished memories, and making more memories to add to them.
Among my beliefs, lie nature, spirituality, mysticism, magic, and karma. I belive that if we continue to harm the Earth, it will fight back, as it has a living spirit; killer bees, fire ants, flesh-eating viruses, global warming... This war has already begun, and Mother Nature's going to win. Yes, I believe in magic, but I also believe that very few people can actually wield it. I believe in a creator, but not in religions, which are all formed and governed by humans, and therefore, corrupt. I believe that political correctness is destroying society, by sugar coating everything, and dulling our senses to the harsh realities of life. I believe that the more organizations, double-standards, and laws we create, in favor of the cause of specific demographs, the worse our racism and intolerance will become. (I believe if you think I'm just a pessimist, you should keep reading.) I BELIEVE IN TRUE LOVE! I BELIEVE IN TRUE FRIENDSHIP!
Yes, I know I am governed, by my feelings, and hide behind a shroud of darkness. I get absorbed in my vices, and my thoughts, and am always on the brink of emotionally self-destructing. But, what is an artist, without emotions, to inspire him? I have no regrets of what I have become. I wouldn't change a thing that has happened to me, because all those things have defined me, and guided me, and ultimately helped me to find myself. This path, of balance, I have followed, has found adventure and home, happiness and pain, love and heartbreak, prosperity and failure. It has led me to my beloved wife, and given me my son. It has led my spirit to others, like me.
There's not much more I can say, at this time, however, that may change, with my mood. In the meantime, if I have wasted your time, I apologize. If I have inspired you, then I look forward to hearing from you. If you find any of this intriguing, then perhaps you can encourage me to get off my writers block and write more blogs.
That's my intro, in a nutshell. Fortune favor you - Solan
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