I can't really label down anything that properly summarizes myself at the current moment since my life (and I'm sure everyone else's) is going through a re-evaluation phase. However, I can still agree with the rest of the worldly population that I am one of the bigger first-class assholes that ever roamed this piece of shit garbage of a planet.
ANYWAY! Back to the point.
My life is a fairytale and how I was born and brought up is legendary. I roundhoused myself out of my mother's womb, flew over to Texas and found Chuck Norris and we dueled in a flashy, comical roundhousing tournament. Which I won by default, because Chuck Norris has been Chuckified with terrible irony. My life tingles with excitement and I enjoy the thrill of delivering a THOUSAND YEARS OF AGONY by shoving my foot down somebody's throat. Because my life fluctuates sporadically, I can never tell what kind of a situation I'd be in, or what kind of a mood would be swinging. Man, I can tell you all of my likes and dislikes and I still won't be 100% accurate about myself. I don't enjoy dead-zone conversations. Period. You can be talking about designer clothing, designer shoes, designer what-the-fuck-ever and I won't give a damn. I'll disregard the whole subject by dropping a bomb about your child looking like Quasimodo from the Hunchback of Notre Dame and the heathen being named "Fruitcake McButtplug Fufufachoo." I make fun of a lot of people regardless of their social status. A lot of them tend to be morons and it's actually entertaining to watch them squirm when they feel they've been demoralized because, a.) it's fun and b.) you / he / she / they / it deserves it. I'm sarcastic by nature and people familiarize themselves with my sarcasm because if you don't get it, then there's no point in talking to me. Don't bother pestering me if you don't have a relevant reason. I'm tolerant on certain areas but I can be the worst person to talk to when you need some form of comfort or advice. If I don't like you, then I don't like you. My personality is indescribable but I'm pretty blunt and unbiased. In general, I'm one of those guys you call an asshole and I'm one of those assholes that calls you dick-bopper or fagbag. I hate serendipity to the point where it's not even funny anymore. Things happen for a reason but running into things that I despise doesn't amuse me nowadays. I'm spontaneous so I can't really keep still in one place figuratively, metaphorically and literally. I'm bound to move from one end of the room to the other, but I'm mostly found rollin' around Liguan, whether it'd be a substantial reason or if I just feel like bustin' somebody in the mouth just for being a cock-sucking cronie.
Oh, and ramming two basketballs down somebody's mouth because they spew inconsequential horse shit and lies among trash talks are always fun.
Ba-Zing!
(P.S.: Don't bother adding me if you're going to remain silent and or you maintain an I.Q. of an incredibly lame 48; I don't enjoy engaging in a conversation with so much futility that we're talking about different subjects about your life's complexities and my ice cream sundae that just dropped on my shoes in which I paid my last five bucks on-- like talking to a brick wall. I also hate stupid ideas. Give me one, and I'll wipe it with my ass. Yeeeaaah, you pathetic motherfuckers. On the catwalk, baby. On the catwalk.)
