Avi

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My name is Avi, my friends call me Avi. I don't want to get married until I'm 30. You need to enjoy your life before you end it. Why is the first question persian girls ask is "what car do you drive." YOU IDIOTS MAKE ME SICK! That goes for all you shabnams, leylas, etc. By the way, the answer to the question is brand new lexus (im kidding relax, i probably just broke a lot of persian girl's hearts!).
TOP 20 THINGS I HATE!!!!!!!!!! LEARN THESE LIKE U DO THE BIBLE, AND FOLLOW THEM!
1) Something I really hate, is how a lot of you morons on myspace, put pictures of HOT GIRLS you dont even know on your TOP 8 list, just to act hard...just so people think you're sum kind of player or anything, when you're nothin but PATHETIC. So PLEASE, dont be fake, BE REAL, and go delete those pictures of the people you dont even know on your TOP 8 FRIENDS list, and put your real friends on there. This goes to all my friends also. Including 1 of my good friends, who is a nice guy, but for some reason, this fakeass motherfucker's top 8 list includes 7 hot girls...and surprise surprise, he doesn't know any of the seven! Please dont be so fake bro. Your fakeness reflects on me and the rest of your good friends.
2) goes out to you ladies, please stop commenting on each others pictures about "Oh you're so hot." If you're going to make that comment, please make sure your friend is actually hot, and not some unattractive beast! And i dont mean to be harsh when i say this, but it's just very annoying when I see a HIDEOUS looking girl, with tons of comments from her friends about how hot she is! Don't lie to the poor girl! You're only gonna make it worst!
3) This goes to all u guys, including some of my good friends. Please stop putting pictures of gangsters and rappers on your profile because you think it will make you look hard! Who are you kidding?! Most of you live in Beverly Hills and would wet your pants and run to your nanas if you saw someone who wasn't white and was wearing baggy clothes. I promise no one thinks of you any cooler because you have a picture of a rapper with a gun. I mean, ya it used to be cool in 7th grade, but please grow up. I hope the BMW your nana or papa bought you is bulletproof!
4) This 1 is for both guys and girls. I was bored out of my mind last night and I was looking at my good friend's profile. And I started to read some of the comments this moron left for other girls, when I noticed something. This idiot flirts with girls from out of state, and i mean way out of state, like he lives in CA and the girl lives in fuckin Wisconsin. If you are reading this, and you think this may be you, can I ask you, WHAT THE FUCK R U DOING?! Don't u have a life?? I'm not saying dont flirt, u should flirt, i flirt, everyone flirts, but sweet mother of Jesus flirt with someone that lives in your fuckin state u jackass! What the fuck r u doin? Do u really think the girls gonna travel from fuckin wisconsin to see your ass?!?! If she does, she deserves to eat airplane food laced with poison! Anyways, the point is, please find something else to do with your precious time then flirt with someone who lives 10,000 miles away. If you're really that desperate, please take a cold shower, or rent a porno. Thank you.
5)This goes for u myspace fucks who have way too much time on your hands and like to supe up your profile every fuckin day. First of all, being original is cool. Im not sayin dont ever change your background color, or picture, but at least leave it on for a fuckin week or so. I mean what the fuck? One day, my friends background is a picture of a hot girls ass, and the very next day, his background is a fuckin buffalo. Remember u idiots, u dont get payed for havin a cool profile or changing it everyday.
6) if 1 more motherfucker tells me to leave them a comment cuz no one has left them 1 the whole day, im gonna beat the shit out of someone! What the fuck is wrong with u losers?! Who gives a fuck if no one left you a fuckin comment?! You're probably a loser as it is anyways, so dont worry about it. Some of u guys really take this myspace way too seriously. I wish I can hack into all your profiles and delete them off myspace. Then again 90% of u morons would then get a heart attack..."Oh my G-D, my myspace got deleted!!! Somebody kill me!!!"
7) This is for both of you guys and girls who have crooked ass, yellow teeth: PLEASE stop taking pictures so up close and posting them! What the hell is wrong with u idiots?? Most likely no one wants to see you so upclose as it is, but i mean especially with those yellowass crooked teeth! This also goes to a couple of my good friends, whose teeth really embarass me when i hang out with them. You know who you are...i've told u 50 times to go to a damn dentist.
8) This 1 is the 1 i prolly hate the most. If 1 more of u motherfuckers sends a BULLETIN saying "SEND THIS OR U WILL DIE", OR "SEND THIS WITHIN 30 MINUTES OR YOU WILL BE SINGLE FOR 10 YEARS" im gonna beat the f**k outta someone. Get a life u DAMN LOSERS! No one is gonna die u morons! And the only person whose gonna stay single, is your ugly, pimpleyfaced loserass for actually wasting your time by sending out these BULLSHIT bulletins. I hope the next person who sends these types of bulletins stays single forever.
9) Ladies & Gents, can u pleaz explain to me why the fuck you feel like u have to post what time it is when u leave me or someone else a comment. No one cares u idiots! I know that 99.9% of you want to leave what time it is because most likely its probably real late at night, and you want to showoff that you've been "out", to like a club or party, and so you write something like (i'll use a girl friend of mine as an example who left a comment like this): "Hey babe, its like 3 am, i just got home from Vanguard, i'll talk to you later." WHAT THE FUCK!?!? Who gives a fuck if u just came home from a club! And who gives a fuck that "its like 3 am." I can almost bet you probably didn't even go out, but your loserass fell asleep watching tv in your room, and before turning off your computer and go to sleep, u thought you'd be "hip" by leaving such a comment. Well you're not, you're a loser! Man some of u should really consider suicide!
10) Oh man this one gets to me. Recently, I left what I consider a kinda funny comment for 2 of my best friends (i left both of them the same comment). In the comment, I joked around about a girl we all recently met and hung out with. I kinda made fun of her in the comment i left them, but in the comment I wrote I'm joking. Well, 1 of my friends, decided to delete this comment that I made, to make himself look good. WTF!?!?! It was a joke u moron! Some of u idiots, including this friend of mine, take myspace WAY too seriously. I think he deleted this comment becuz he wants to get "some" from this girl, so he's trying to show this girl "he's not an asshole like Avi is." Well, if you're reading this u moron, first of all, sorry to break it to u, she dozent dig u like that at all, 2nd of all, dont delete funny comments just to try to make yourself look good. 3rd of all, becuz our other friend didn't delete this comment i made, I am going to hook him up with this girl! I hope u get the point ladies n gents. And to my moron friend, if you're reading this, ..1 and ..7 on this list applies to you also! Do something about it!
11) This one is the scariest one. It goes out to you all you child molesting guys out there. You know who you are. Let me explain. Lately, i've been noticing a very distrubing trend on myspace. As I browse through some of my friends pictures, i notice a lot of them have pictures of them and their 3 or 4 year old nephews on their lap. WTF?!?! Are u kidding me u sick fucks? Are u that desperate to pick up woman? Rent a porno or something for heavens sakes. I'm embarassed to call some of u guys my friends. And what is up with that wickedass smile u sickos have as that poor defenseless nephew of yours is sitting on your lap? Does it excite you or something? And I will notify child health services if I see this continue! You are scarring for life these poor innocent little kids. Molesting little boys is no way to try to pick up ladies. Or is your goal to pick up other little boys? And ladies, you do not help when you leave stupid ass comments like "oh so cute, just like his uncle." So it's cute to molest little kids now? I think instead of going out im gonna babysit this weekend... Many of u molesters are unfortunately my friends and this reflects very poorly on me.
12) Ladies n Gents, this 1 annoys me very much. If you're gonna make a profile, please make sure its nicely setup. Let me explain. I'm so sick of going to these profiles, where on the top is a video clip of something, and then right under that, is a song, and then in the comment section, someone else has left a clip. MAN this is annoying! Fix it! I don't want to watch a fuckin clip of Jay Leno as a fuckin Kelly Clarkson song is playing tand meanwhile a semi-pornographic video clip is playing on your comments section (put up by 1 of your pervert friends who thinks hes funny), and this all happening AT THE SAME TIME! It gives me and others a headache. And I know that u know u can fix this problem. Just delete your pervert friends comment and either take off the video clip or song. Your profile probably sucks as it is, so please dont make it worst. Thanks.
13) This 1 pisses me off, and is mostly dedicated to 1 of my friends (and others) whose had the same gay coldplay song playing on his gay profile for the last 3 years! Change your music once in a while u idiots! Play something new dammit. If i hear another usher song from 1995 i will kill myself. It's bad enough your profile looks really retarted and gay, and i feel embarrased enough having to leave u a comment where others can see (and know we r friends), but at least let me listen to something good while i'm writing the damn comment. And for the record, this was not a diss on coldplay, i do like 1 or 2 of their songs, but this particular song my friend has been playing for 3 years is really gay. thank u.
14) I'm sorry ladies, but this 1 is dedicated to you. If you're going to make your profile set to private, please make sure you're very hot. I know its hard for those of you that are hot, cuz every1 keeps wanting you to add them, and it can be annoying. But if i may be so rude and ask those of u who are not hot by any means, why are you setting your profile to private?!?! I bet when it wasn't private, not more than 1 or 2 (drunk) guys ever requested you to add them, so again, why are you making your profile private?! I suspect its because you have 1 really hot friend, who got so many add requests she was forced into making her profile private, so you thought you would do the same. Instead of wasting your time making your profile private, why dont u do all of us a favor and convince your hot friend not to make hers private, so we can see her hot pics. And ladies, you know exactly who you are, i've actually told 2 of my girlfriends that there was no need to make their profiles private, but they took it personally and have since refused to talk to me.
15) This 1 has been itching my skin lately (pissed me off). This 1 goes out to you stupid mofos who think you're some kind of philosopher. Stop with your insane/weird/cracked out/twisted philosophy poems on your pages! I am so sick of visiting my friends profiles and finding right in the front a paragraph comparing "your life to wind howling in the night." What the F*** is wrong with u morons? Please tell me you are (1) high (2) drunk (3) high and drunk (4) coked out (5) high, drunk, and coked out or finally (6) just came outta the mental institute. You are no fuckin aristotle! I repeat, you are no aristotle. You are making yourself look dumber than your myspace pictures. And you're probably scaring your friends, if you have any. If I want to read some philosophy crap, i'll go read some real philosophy books. If i want to show children the negative effects of drugs, i'll have them read your philosophical crap on your myspace page. Actually, if i combined that and your myspace pictures, it really would make a great ad for not doing drugs. Number 15 here is very much dedicated to 1 of my friends, who recently a wrote philosphical paragraph...bro if u are reading this, your parents r worried about you, they think u are on herione, and so do i. Thank you.
16) This 1 is dedicated, to the man, the myth, the homo, Tom. Listen here u son of a bitch, if those motherfuckin happy face/smile face thingys that u advertise on the top of each page yell stupid shit 1 more time I'm gonna beat the hell outta your mother. I'm sure u guys know what im talking about. I'll be on the fone with a hot girl, all of a sudden, i stupidly forget I am still logged onto myspace, then out of no where, while im tryin to impress this girl, my computer yells "SAY SOMETHING!" Then i have to come up with a lie like my friend is over and he's so gay cuz he's always on myspace. And oh ya, 1 time i fell asleep by my computer, and again unfortunately my myspace was on, and all of a sudden that dumb fuckin voice yelled "SAY SOMETHING!". I was terrified and thought i was being freakin robbed. Anyways, back to the point, u greedy son of a bitch tom, u already make enough money, straighten up your damn advertising. Fix it u asshole!
17) This one proves to me a lot of people on Myspace are complete morons. Can sum1 explain why the hell u idiots put your real phone numbers on your friends comment page? Are you really that dumb?! Just last week i pranked 8 people (who i dont even know) who left their phone numbers on my friends pages. It was a lot of fun waking them up at 2 am. But i do suspect a lot of you are so desperate, you leave your phone numbers on purpose, hoping someone from the opposite sex (in some cases, same sex) calls and u go out on a date. So listen up u losers, the only phone calls u will be getting are from me and others who want to prank your goony-faced pimpley asses. By the way, 1 of the people I pranked was dumb enough to leave their house number, and when i called their mom went berzerk, i think she was in the middle of doing u know what. Although if she resembled anything like her daughter, that man must have been piss ass drunk. Dont leave your real phone numbers u morons.
18) This one is dedicated to you morons who make bulletins about the certain number of comments or friends you have. Here's an example of a bulletin 1 of my homo friends left a couple of weeks ago: "Hey guys, I am only 1 comment away from 500...!!!" You fuckin dumb loser, u act like u are gonna get a million dollars or sumtin once u hit 500. This idiot acts like he's hit a milestone or something. Anyways, point of the story here is there are a lot of other things to celebrate then getting your 500th comment on freakin myspace. SHOOT YOURSELF.
19) This 1 right here, tops them all. Someone explain to me why you idiots continue filling out those stupid fuckin surveys! WHY?! I could care less who the 3rd person was that called your cell today, I could care less what the 52nd fuckin song on your ipod is, I could care less what your great grandsmothers maiden name was, and I really don't care about who is the 5th person on your top 8 list, and especially for u hideous lookin mofos, I certainly do not want to know about your sexual life! Get a fuckin life u morons! Do u actually think anyone reads them??? And this goes out to a couple of my good friends, who have no life, and possibly may be homos, because they do about 5 of these surveys per day. Hey homos, NO ONE READS THEM! Stop wasting your time! Ok thats it for now, I'm gonna go fill out a survey of my own. First question is what the last person I slept withs grandmothers neighbors favorite drink is. I think its poison.
*NEW* 20) This 1 I have been hating for a while. If I see 1 more of those bulletins that say: "Ok, i'm trying to see who my real friends are. Repost this and title it Real Friends and I will not delete you off my friends list. If you see the next bulletin i post, it means I didnt delete you". Oh shut the F**k up!!! Just shutup! Shoot yourself! Jump off a building! Drink poison, twice. Everytime I see 1 of those bulletins, I purposely don't repost your bulletin, so you can take me off your list, but somehow, my prayer goes unanswered, and I somehow remain on your friends list. What is the point of this bulletin? It's ridiculously gay. Gayer than Michael Jackson with 2 drunk 10 yr old boys at his mansion. From now on I will just make life easier and delete any douchebag(s) putting this lame bulletin up.
THATS IT FOR NOW...PLEASE CHECK BACK AS I WILL CONSTANTLY UPDATE MY PROFILE WITH MORE THINGS I HATE. THANK YOU, THANK YOU VERY MUCH! WOAH YA! (i jacked that last line from Sam "the Don" Essy)