Who's got time ta write? I only got time ta drink booze and steal. Okay, okay...I'll tell ya a little about me. First of all, I was born somewhere in 1898?...1899?...1900? Somethin' like that. The memory's a big blur. So's my vision. I was one of those orphan kids, see? And, if Little Orphan Annie was in my orphanage, I would've kicked her little orphan ass. I was a bad kid. I could steal better than all the other kids and I already was drinkin' gin and smokin' before I was six! It was so swell, I was top of the heap! But then, they threw me out on the street ta fend for myself. So, I did the only thing I knew to stay alive...STEALIN' AND ROBBIN'! And I was good at it! I finally joined this crooked vaudeville racket and I'd lift mink coats and diamond rings off all the fancy ladies who came to see the show...right under their noses! I got really good at pickpocketing too! But then, my manager wasn't givin' me my share of the goods, see, and I was startin' ta get real mad at him. One night, these ol' timey lookin' ladies came ta see a show. They looked real queer...not today's queer, but Roaring 20's queer...and they busted into the dressing room when I was fightin' it out with my manager. Well, those ladies beat the livin' shit outta him and tossed him in the alley. These broads were tough and I wanted ta be one of them. Their queen, (she likes ta call herself "Queen"- God, how stupid), asked me if I wanted ta receive the gift of Eternal Life through the Power of Evil. I said, "Sure, who wouldn't? As long as I can take my gin bottle with me. (Burp!) We cut our fingers, passed around our blood, and bingo, I became part of this Evil Sister girl gang...and yeah, I LIVE FOREVER!!! (Learn more about Minnie at: www.myevilsistersmovie.com or check out scenes from the movie on YOU TUBE under MY EVIL SISTERS)
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