The Martinez profile picture

The Martinez

About Me

I friggin hate cascading style sheets. Oh sure, why not learn about CSS while taking a webmastery class? Pffft. Err. I am a huge nerd when it comes to video games, especially if I happen to like them. I must do absolutely everything in a game if I happen to like it, which dooms me to play the same games for years. Like, oh, say, Super Metroid, which keeps having new crap pop up in it.
My tongue is quite sharp, and frequently pops out of my mouth to say something brilliant and/or retarded, like that drug addict radio DJ from It. Nothing and no one is above being mocked, and if more people believed in that, the world would be a more hilarious place. Probably not nessacarily better, though.
To those who question my choice in colors: purple is a friggin awesome color. Anyone who does not like purple is a chump. Samuel L. Jackson likes purple, and he gets eaten by a shark for breakfast.
If the Army and the Navy ever look on Heaven's scenes, They will find the streets are guarded by United States Marines.

My Blog

Generic Rage

SO!I go on this field op, right? Three weeks long in the scorching/freezing desert. No shower, I smell like dead ass. Working vigoriously to keep communications up and running between the artillery li...
Posted by on Sat, 09 May 2009 20:55:00 GMT

Jerichoholic

So. Some fans were being obnoxious. Probably because they were Canadian fans, and Canadians are by trade obnoxious. Well, they decided to take out their obnoxiousness on one man: Chris Jericho. Chris ...
Posted by on Fri, 13 Feb 2009 18:18:00 GMT

Say "Uncle"

Abomination against Mankind to be released soon.Uncles everywhere to force their nephews to view the movie.
Posted by on Sat, 24 Jan 2009 16:25:00 GMT

Disconnected

So, there was a monk on my flight.Like, a real monk. Wrapped in cloth, bald head, sandals, had a handbag that looked like he wove it himself. I was like, hey, cool. It's a monk. That's neat.He was sea...
Posted by on Sun, 04 Jan 2009 10:48:00 GMT

Red Alert

J.K. Simmons as President of the United States.Tim Curry as Premier of Russia.George Takei as Emperor of Japan.Also featuring Lady Deathstrike, the Orbitz gum lady, that UFC hawt lady Gina Carwhatsit,...
Posted by on Sat, 08 Nov 2008 00:14:00 GMT

To all who see these presents, greetings.

DEPARTMENT OF THE NAVYTHIS IS TO CERTIFY THAT THE SECRETARY OF THE NAVY HAS AWARDED THENAVY AND MARINE CORPS ACHIEVEMENT MEDALTOLANCE CORPORAL ROLANDO P. MARTINEZUNITED STATES MARINE CORPSFORPROFESSIO...
Posted by on Thu, 09 Oct 2008 20:33:00 GMT

Quickie

Note to marketing execs:Getting spam mail from the floral company I used to deliver flowers to two funerals does -not- make me want to use their services again.
Posted by on Tue, 26 Aug 2008 16:12:00 GMT

Underwhelmed.

So, I saw Dark Knight......and see the title. Now, now, now, put your cabbages and tomatoes away. I'm by no means saying I thought it was a -bad- movie. I found it enjoyable. Somewhat poorly paced, bu...
Posted by on Fri, 25 Jul 2008 21:10:00 GMT

Rerumor mill

Watchmen trailer rumored to be playing before Dark Knight Returns.:O
Posted by on Wed, 16 Jul 2008 18:03:00 GMT

Guns of the Patriots

...doesn't have the same ring to it as "Sons of Liberty."Also, STAY AWAY FROM THE INTERNET if you want to play this game. Seriously. I've had the entire thing ruined for me in like, ten seconds. Which...
Posted by on Fri, 06 Jun 2008 16:50:00 GMT