{NUMBED BY A DREAM}{RIP} - ProfilesArchive

About Me

Hi, I'm Alicia. I'm on a journey in life to find something that will satisfy me completely, eternally. I carry inside of me an intense somberness, a sadness similar to the one I feel upon the end of an amazing book. It's like something you cherished dearly upon the way, and now that it's over.. you try to find replacements, but there's no fulfillment, in the end. Hence, the journey is better than the end. Life motto. So I live fast to die young, hoping to find that something that will keep me enraptured for eternity. I'm really not this deep in person. Try to get to know me. Even if I spill my whole life story, you still won't understand who I am. I'm starting to prefer it that way.

My Interests

I work, I sleep, I go to school, occasionally I eat. I love reading. TV ceases to phase me any longer. I love my pets, especially my kitties. I smoke like a fucking chimney. I hate being alone.

I'd like to meet:

someone with substance that can fill this empty hole.

Music:

Anything with some structure, or lack thereof. Something that can make me dance, or fall in love with the beauty of everything around me, even when I'm stuck in a shithole. Anything so imperfect that it's perfect to me.

Movies:

All time favorites are Edward Scissorhands, Nightmare Before Christmas, P.S. I Love You. I'm a sucker for cheesy romantic comedies.

Television:

Yeah fuck you too.

Books:

The list will forever continue on, but as of right now: The Fifth Vial Anything by Jodi Picoult, specifically My Sister's Keeper and The Tenth Circle Candide Any biography about some insane person Third Person Plural Looking for Alaska All the Harry Potter books, all the time.

Heroes:

My mother and my best friend Jessie. Both of whom I rarely see crack under pressure, but when I do I realize how strong they really are. Both of whom have been there for me throughout the years, providing some sort of a constant in my life while everything around me is shifting. Both of whom I love to death, and would easily take a bullet for.

My Blog

where did it all go wrong?

I can't remember when your eyes stopped smilingwhen they rested upon me.Maybe if I'd seen it thenI could have prevented all of this pain. Maybe if I had been able to realizeThat you were slipping away...
Posted by {NUMBED BY A DREAM}{RIP} on Fri, 18 Jul 2008 09:50:00 PST

Cannot Be Empty

So I named this "Cannot Be Empty" because after I finished writing the first stanza, I heard that phrase on the television in the next room over.. Fitting and appropriate. Tell me what you think.How d...
Posted by {NUMBED BY A DREAM}{RIP} on Wed, 23 Jan 2008 11:09:00 PST

on a descending note.

don't read it if you don't want to. don't complain to me about it. i don't need your critiscm because it's exactly how i feel and no one can change my feelings. I am broken.I am alone.I am all you nev...
Posted by {NUMBED BY A DREAM}{RIP} on Sat, 27 Oct 2007 11:55:00 PST

laskufjlsaf

Death hangs in the air tonightInvading our hollow souls -Filling every empty voidUntil our hearts are no longer cracked.Poison, my love, is all you have shownDisguised as a passionate kissBut even the...
Posted by {NUMBED BY A DREAM}{RIP} on Fri, 06 Apr 2007 01:24:00 PST

the past always manages to weave itself in

one of the most honest things i've written lately. Endlessly searching for comfortOf something that is longtime pastI still cannot seem to let goOf everything you granted me.I was drowning in all the ...
Posted by {NUMBED BY A DREAM}{RIP} on Tue, 03 Apr 2007 07:05:00 PST

new - i don't know what to call it?

I had been inspired, so it's a little out of the ordinary.. criticize, constructively. Through the Looking Glass. We walk through the waste Of such pretty dreadful things - Our footsteps would li...
Posted by {NUMBED BY A DREAM}{RIP} on Fri, 30 Mar 2007 12:18:00 PST

Tales of complacency and fragmented souls.

The dark nights were filled with taunting dreams, the days with utter longing. Loneliness, once a hunger in me, subsides and gives way to emptiness, a riptide in a...
Posted by {NUMBED BY A DREAM}{RIP} on Fri, 03 Nov 2006 08:18:00 PST

Fallen from grace.

Longing consumes my soul. Cold to the touch. Basking in the glow of my own pallid skin. Desperation sinks in as your departure takes place. These empty eyes radiate desolation. I part my lids to allow...
Posted by {NUMBED BY A DREAM}{RIP} on Tue, 08 Aug 2006 03:36:00 PST

Collection of writings in the past few months.

In the midst of our goodbyes, sorrow lay fitfully in the air, invading our minds and laboring our breathing. The salty air clung thick and close to our soft skin, the waves crashed down. I felt ...
Posted by {NUMBED BY A DREAM}{RIP} on Sun, 16 Jul 2006 07:49:00 PST