"To all of the animals who keep sipping the sweat from my back, you're making me ill and I can't get enough."
This right here is the 'space' of Jackson Tradition Kobrakai Von Hooligan - layabout, burgeoning militant, party host, wordsmith and Brigadier.
I am a man/child who likes nothing more than sitting off, watching cartoons and wrestling, and laughing at very inappropriate things - jazzy.
I take myself fairly seriously at times and have a very short temper, especially when certain Australian twats are mentioned. However most of the time I tend to be fairly laid back and quite open, both with what I say and how I act, so if you're easily offended or have very 'thin skin' then do everyone a favour and avoid me, chances are I'll offend you.
I have no time for fakes, liars, people who bastardise my trust or 'weak people' (Mainly stemming from my own pretentiousness and an unholy desire to be Henry Rollins).
So yes, let's talk about all the things that we have in common...
TOP TEN JACKSON PACKED FACTS:
1: I am 'straight edge' - no drink, no drugs, no tobacco. No one's choice but my own innit.
2: I am awful with money and am succeptable to retarded purchases - recent impulse; sunglasses in winter.
3: I would love to be any of the following; a WWI flying ace, an owner of a comic shop, a Japanese wrestler, a film director, a dinosaur.
4: I love a good adventure, but can't be bothered learning to drive. As such I have been challenged to attain my pilot's licence before my driver's licence, but this too is impossible due to me having the eyesight of a retarded mole.
5: I am fairly easy to bribe, be it with money, hugs, toast, comics or little wind up toy robots - they are fucking cool.
6: I have been known to be easily stressed and fairly paranoid, just try and appease me and the world will not be destroyed. Don't hurt me and I'll love you forever.
7: I'm an avid gamer, currently Xbox 360 (Gamertag: Von Hooligan) but I also love the old Nintendos (Specifically N64 - Blast Corps anyone?).
As such I work for a gaming website - Charming Hooligans.
8: I am also one half of an extremely small scale film production company ( Fungunt Productions ) our first release 'Mung.' is available soon.
9: I've been told that my image changes a lot, not like Morph from X-Men, but general beard and hair re-shapes are apparently frequent. I am currently rocking the 'Wannabe Gattuso' look, nice.
10: If you steal my beats I'm taking you out.
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How I make sure everything remains raw:
Tonight on BBC2. .
