Scotford - ProfilesArchive

About Me

I love every, single subtle nuance of gods glorious creation living on this cold rock hurtling through space. every one of you is truly special and nothing would bring me more joy than seeing you face down in a pool of your own blood, your entrails strewn across the floor, being consumed by rats.

I like lying amongst the periwinkles. I enjoy sitting in my room by candlelight, listening to the cure and writing poetry while pontificating the depth of the various shades of black.

I enjoy candlelit walks and romantic dinners on the beach. I am apathetic to most things as of late, but particularily irrational/illogical people. I'm just kidding, I do not really hate anyone, I just like confusing people.

*My newest goal is to prove that apoptosis can happen on more than the cellular level using myself as a subject.

*update* new evidence pertaining to my experiment. it works. results soon.

My Interests

I'd like to meet:

Young urban professionals, motivated socialist environmentalists, people who use the word like, but not as an adjective, young Christian idealists, young satanic nihilists, people who enjoy having or going to bake sales, members of the communist dentist albino association, people who think television mimics actual real life issues, Satan, Jesus, basically anyone. Except young republicans.

I have no interest in meeting emotional vampires or anyone who lives life by a rule of learned helplessness.

Oh and bands? bands i've never heard of?

yeah, i don't care. not even a little. maybe try messaging me first instead of the random add because i will just make fun of you. if you want me to add you, send me a CD care of

2255B Queen St. E. Suite ..3266 Toronto, ON M4E 1G3

i need new coasters for my new coffee table

i'm not going to waste precious wireless time listening to your music through the shitty 1 inch diameter speakers on my laptop. it does neither of us any good. if you dont totally suck i might add you, but probably not.

attention hot chicks in swimwear: fuck off, i hate you more than bands. if you're not going to talk to me, don't add me. we're never going to hang out, we have nothing in common and i have no desire to increase your web presence.

My Blog

kinky sex makes the world go 'round

These are the lyrics to a song Jello did with the Dead Kennedy's. It's from the album "Give Me Convenience Or Give Me Death", which was released in 1987. That was Twenty years ago. Think it over."Ring...
Posted by on Mon, 09 Apr 2007 21:00:00 GMT

I think we all feel that way about our mothers. And we all have legs.

The right to arm bears If you talk to the average American, the second amendment of the U.S. constitution just means that they have the right to bear arms. But then there are your average American gu...
Posted by on Mon, 09 Apr 2007 10:17:00 GMT

pump up the jam...

turn your volume up. pay no attention to the visuals, this is an audio odessey. it will be such a shame when eric leaves this world.
Posted by on Mon, 26 Mar 2007 12:50:00 GMT

food poisoning, vodka and shitting the bed

Sadly I am still hyper busy with pre-production of the mag and sadly, aside from notes pining for love lost, I aint writing shit. By the beginning of April I will be back to writing copy for the mag, ...
Posted by on Thu, 22 Mar 2007 07:21:00 GMT

lazy so very lazy

Well it would seem I am going to be a mark-ass bitch (does that sound contrived? Cyrus once told me I couldn't pull off hip-hop phraseology, and I think he may be right) and post another played out wo...
Posted by on Tue, 13 Mar 2007 08:43:00 GMT

violently bored

One night, a few summers back I went into a drug store with a girl I was engaging in intercourse with at the time. The game plan was to pick up an assortment of items, salsa, corn chips, magazines, ha...
Posted by on Mon, 05 Mar 2007 17:56:00 GMT

Haikus for my top friends

In honor of my top friends, whom I probably don't lavish with enough praise and kind words, and in honor of tomorrow which is the anniversary of the day that the Japanese invented rice, I am going to ...
Posted by on Sat, 03 Mar 2007 17:27:00 GMT

kyle, jehovahs witnesses and smart ass comments

My good friend Kyle recently had some Jehovah's Witnesses stop by his doorstep, or in this case, his myspace mail box. They sent him a message about how he needs to study the bible. Since I felt they ...
Posted by on Fri, 23 Feb 2007 13:04:00 GMT

whiskers

Moustaches seem to be at an all time low in popularity. I could almost see the moustache being the much-awaited successor to 1999's smash hit the mullet. For reasons not totally understood to me (but ...
Posted by on Wed, 21 Feb 2007 06:54:00 GMT

cultural wasteland

Sometimes it seems the concept of culture is lost on the western world. In the melting pot of Canadian culture with the multitudes of individual cultures coalescing something gets lost. And I think c...
Posted by on Fri, 16 Feb 2007 14:06:00 GMT