Andrew profile picture

Andrew

I am here for Friends and Networking

About Me

Hello my name is Andrew and I’m a recovering sociopath. (Hi Andrew) Hi, great, good to be here. I also happen to be a stand up comedian. Originally I wanted to be a scientist or astronaut but you have to be realistic about your goals so I pursued a career in stand up comedy. Besides, my short stint as a cocaine mule faltered and I ran out of viable contingency plans. My first open mic, circa April 2007 almost never happened. I was intensely nervous, thinking I’d be beaten to death by a mob of angry drunks and I almost didn’t go on stage. Serenity, another comic, saw the apprehension on my face and gave me some much needed advice. Her guidance inspired a change of heart with a few encouraging words of wisdom. She said, “Don’t be such a pussy.” Honestly, I cherish those beautiful words. Boom! Stage fright gone.Since that moment I've never looked back. Whoo! Here's some more things that have no relevance to significant world events. I've been mentioned in "Dennis To Society", a Comedy Album released in '07 by comedian Dennis Swennumson. What else is there to know about me? Under the influence of Jack Daniels I attempted to insight a riot during a comedy show at Cheney City Hall... no punitive reprocution yet. (Crossing my fingers)Now about my personal life: When I'm not raging against the status quo I'm involved in a myriad of other activities. For examle, some times I masturbate into hallucinations. I also like to paint my face like a clown, deficate over drunken transients whom have passed out, and verbally abuse kittens. As for romance, I enjoy long walks on the beach and swarms of agitated bees. If there is anything else you need to know you can E-mail me at [email protected] or contact me through this myspace page and I'd be glad to oblige you. I try to reply to any E-mail you send.

My Interests

I'd like to meet:

I'm interested in meeting anyone interested in improving humanity and anyone interested in shit jokes. I would also love to meet a pimp who has had his jaw broken by an irrate amazonian type woman. I’d be especially interested in meeting anyone who thinks the members KKK (Klu Klux K***suckers) should be forced to walk new a million man march on bloody nubs after the roads have been freshly salted. I would love to meet a high Mormon priest who has clandestinely engaged in premarital orgies with interracial couples while under the influence of acid. Most of all I’d really enjoy meeting intelligent people who don’t impede live performances. So far my favorite heckler situation. ME: I don’t feel so good, I’m sort of bloated and I don’t think it’s all gas. HECKLER: Poop! You’re talking about poop! ME: Yes, wet feces is what I was driving at sir. HECKLER: oooh, ‘feces’ now you’re using big words. ME:...This is when I broke down on stage and threw a temper tantrum. That awkward quip has haunted me ever since. Releatedly I've met tons of wonderful people doing this comedy thing. When I'm not walking transvestites with an anti-circumcision bit or drinking myself into a stupor I'm making friends. I'd like to thank all the people I've met doing shows out West. You all make life worth living! Oh, and before I forget.
Photo courtesy of Stroke of Light Photography

My Blog

Live this Sunday

COME CHECK US OUT THIS SUNDAY! WE'LL BE PUTTING ON A "TRIBUTE" MORE OF A HOMAGE TO LENNY BRUCE. ONE OF THE WORLD'S 1ST "FILTHY" COMEDIANS. Come check out: Scott Kirkingburg, Paul Hearst, & Andrew Ouel...
Posted by on Fri, 31 Jul 2009 23:03:00 GMT

Update

Hey folks, new update. I was recently hired to do a feature act at Chuckles this last weekend, opening for Chris Warren as he filmed his DVD. First night things went amazingly, no complaints. The corr...
Posted by on Mon, 08 Jun 2009 00:14:00 GMT

Rolling along

Hey Folks, it's me, the childhood Demons squating inside Andrew's stinky festering wound of a soul! Just kidding, it's me and I don't have a soul... sold it for bubblegum. Anyway, big news. Just heard...
Posted by on Sat, 16 May 2009 17:03:00 GMT

Album progress

Ok folks, here's the skinny on this album. The audio is in it's final stages of editing and we've begun working on the video footage. Everything is coming along nicely. The album art is being worked o...
Posted by on Fri, 15 May 2009 20:53:00 GMT

Live Album Finally Recorded!

Finally After two years in the making, "Free To Offend" is successfully recorded. I want to thank everyone who came out to the show last night and I would greatly like to thank the folks at the AlterK...
Posted by on Fri, 01 May 2009 17:08:00 GMT

LIVE COMEDY TAPING APRIL 30th!

Show On April 30thCome see me tape my live comedy act this Thursday at The Alter Knit Lounge. Located on the side of the Knitting Factory 919 W Sprague Ave. Spokane WA, 99201. For general or ticket in...
Posted by on Sun, 26 Apr 2009 14:22:00 GMT

Astronaut claims alien cover-up

NASA astronaut Edgar Mitchell claims alien contact cover-upThe Daily Telegraph: July 24, 2008 ..........Ex-astronaut claims 60-year cover-up Little, strange-looking aliens have visited UFOs, aliens: R...
Posted by on Mon, 20 Apr 2009 23:18:00 GMT

PETA betrays activists?

First off I'll give you my take on this story: Yes, PETA should not be executing animals like this without trying to find them a home. Hopefully it's always humane. It IS extremely hypocritical of the...
Posted by on Fri, 03 Apr 2009 06:11:00 GMT

Twitter sucks

Twitter? What happened to talking or thinking out what you're going  to say before you say it? What is this blathering idiocy? Nobody cares that you feel the need to spit your boring droll all over th...
Posted by on Tue, 24 Mar 2009 03:43:00 GMT

Science is intense

Animal-Human Hybrids Spark ControversyMaryann MottNational Geographic NewsJanuary 25, 2005..Scientists have begun blurring the line between human and animal by producing chimerasa hybrid creature tha...
Posted by on Fri, 20 Mar 2009 04:33:00 GMT