Jonathan

i'm jonny, i'm 20 and i live just outside preston. i'd rather live in seattle, it seems a bit nicer there. my friends are the most important people in my life, without them i don't know where i'd be. they're my true heroes. if you're on the right side of me then you can expect a friend for life, if you're on the wrong side of me then you'll have to move mountains. seemingly i have a thing for redheaded girls. i'm in love with a girl i'm not sure even exists in a world outside my head. i tend to flirt with any girl that pays me enough attention for long enough, if this happens to you it doesn't mean i like you. i'd like to think i'm nice but in reality i'm shallow, patronising, condescending, bitchy and arrogant. according to northerners i sound southern and according to southerners i sound northern. a lot of the time i'll just smile, nod and agree because it makes conversations easier. i'm a christian, don't like that? see yazzzz! i like playing football, i'm pretty good i think, i'm not amazing though. i support newcastle united, they'll not be bothering chelsea or barcelona any time soon though. one of my hobbies is to pretend i'm a militant member of the black panthers, you honky. i like music too, i like norma jean a lot but i hate anyone else that likes them. wanna fight about it? there's a friends quote for every occassion, i'll usually say it. i have a polaroid camera, i use it occassionally, it makes me look cool. louise michelle and i pioneered laurel and hardycore dancing, it's like hardcore dancing in the style of laurel and hardy. mo'fo'. i'm going to buy an acoustic guitar, learn to play it and write some songs, if i can be bothered. i'd prefer it if i never grow up. black and white photographs hide my ugly. i use the word "awesome" too much, i'm going to start using "top notch" instead. i like reading about conspiracy theories and serial killers and pretending that it helps my education. it doesn't because i'm studying criminology and sociology, which was a disappointment. i think vince vaughn is possibly the coolest guy ever, i'd do anything to be like him. 'sup?!' i hate scenesters, i hate your music taste. i'm not straight edge so shut up. according to ross noble i am a crusty policeman, stoner, rob zombie look-a-like, recycling, rubbish tip dwelling, owl headbutting, protesting vegetarian student. i don't drink and i don't smoke either, i try and stay healthy.
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every single one of my friends means the world to me but these three have helped me through so much, i don't know where i'd be without them.
me and samuel spend our days playing on pro evo and becoming infatuated with footballers from west africa. sometimes we venture out the house together and shout insults at people that don't mean anything outside the context of our heads or quote programmes we've watched too much.
me and louise spend our days bitching about anything and everything which pops into our heads. sometimes we go on walks to the shops of penwortham, other times we reminisce about when pennies were round.
me and elizabeth spend our days watching dvds and eating sweeties. sometimes we discuss boys and girls and how much we do/don't like certain ones.
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