When you live with death so close, You come to appreciate life all the more.And when you share that life with friends, Like those that I have come to know these last years, Then you know Paradise.
When ever we lose a loved one, we resolve, inevitably, to never forget, to remember that dear person for all our living days. But we the living contend wiht the present, and the present often commands all of our attention. And so as the years pass, we do not remember those who have gone before us everyday, or even every tenday. Then comes the guilt, for if i'm not remembering, who is? And if no one is, then perhaps he is really gone. As the years pass, the guilt will lessen, because we forget more consistently and the pendulum turns in our self-serving thoughts to applaud ourselves on those increasingly rare occasions when we do remember! There is always the guilt, perhaps, because we are self-centered creatures to the last.It is difficult to realize that you cannot win every battle for every friend. It is difficult to understand and accept your own limitations and with them, the recognition that while you try to do your best you can, it will ofthen prove inadequate.Seize the moment and seize the day. Revel in the joy and fight all the harder against despair.It matters of the heart, courage cannot overcome cowardice until I am honest with myself, until I admit the truth.I have to hold faith that things will clarify, that I will find the answers I need.In my stubborn youth, I believed that I could stand alone, that I was strong enough to conquer my fears. Arrogance convinced me that by sheer determination, I could conquer helplessness itself. Stubborn and foolish youth, I must admit, for when I look back on those years now, I see quite clearly that rarely did I stand alone and rarely did I have to stand alone. Always there were friends, true and dear; leanding me their support even when I believed that I did not want it, and even when I did not realize they were doing it. Angie, Julio, Fenny, Bob, Sandy, Maribel, Amalia, Maria, Esther, Liz, Shirley, Miguel, Rob, Yesenia, Cynthia, Chirs, Kathy, Sandra, Edgar, Gloria, Krystal, Lupe, Salomon, Omar,and Betty. These are the companions who justified my principles, who gave me strenght to continue against my foe, real or imagined. These are the companions who fought the helplessness, the rage, the frustation. These are the friends who gave me my life. Thank You, All of You.Is morality not an internal force, and if it is, are principles then to be dictated or felt?So follows the question of the gods themselves: Are these named entities, in truth, actual beings, or are they manifestions of shared beliefs?
When Christians' battle in the Crusades and charged across the field, shouting the name of God in air, were they following the precepts of God, or is God merely the idealized name they give their actions?
This I cannot answer, nor, I have come to realize, can anyone else, no matter how loudly they might argue otherwise. In the end, to a preacher's ultimate sorrow, the choice of god is a personal one, and the alignment to a being is in accord with one's internal code of principles.
Promise me that you will reconsider your course when i am no more. There is a wide world out there, my friend, full of pain, but filled with joy as well. The former keeps you on the path of growth, and the latter keeps the journey tolerable.
"Religion has actually convinced people that there's an invisible man - living in the sky - who watches everything you do, every minute of the day. And the invisible man has a special list of ten things he does not want you to do. And if you do any of these ten things, he has a special place, full of fire and smoke and burning and torture and anguish, where he will send you to live and suffer and burn and choke and scream and cry forever and ever ..til the end of time....But He loves you!"
I edited my profile with Thomas Myspace Editor V3.6 !
If you want to know about me, ask people that know me. In truth i don't even know myself. I'm serious, one not to play around much, and have great knowledge. Although, according to some I am "brusco", lets see... dont feed me candy in the morning especially if you stit infront of me cause i get really hyper, REALLY hyper(ask the peole that sit infront of me, even the ones two seats away). Well I have recently taken up the hobbie of paintball, and recovering my old one of drawing.(note to self: post up pics of drawings) Well, to me friends are almost everything(you know there are those people that are called parents, yeah they are also a part of your life if you did'nt know that.) love to hang around with them. So yeah, this "About Me", will be an on going project, until the next update.
Update ..2 Date: 04.01.06
Fuck its about time i updated this shit, well lets see, i would like to restate the fact that i am weird. To those who know me, not a big news flash. Oh yeah my eyes are back to normal, and no i was not high for those two days, even though i seemed like it. lol. Lets see what do i dislike bout people, hmmm? I really dont hold shit against people, if something happens i let it go, and give it another try. Well then again i have my limits, the only way id say u can get me pissed off is when i wake up, if u bother me in the first 10 mins after i wake up ur going to get hell from me. So my sleeping time is sacred. That brings up the fact that i like, no LOVE, to take naps, yupyup. Im not productive if i dont have my nap, even in class. If im sleepy let me sleep for 5 min and i wake up like new, it happens every so ofthen in my 6th period, well then again who doesnt sleep in Lizzaragas class, lol. Lets see, i love my Starbucks, good for the body, good for the soul, lol ( more like good for my rambaling mouth, it never shuts up) Well recently nothing much has happened, well atleast not publicaly, if u want to know let me gain ur trust and ill tell u, if ud like to know. Well this is it for today, until my next update, peace out.
This was us, the Eco-Club,at the recent Water Conservation Workshop.
We were supposed to do a "Beach" Clean-Up but it was actually a LONG BEACH clean-up, lol, it was weird but we still had fun, fighting for trash!
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05.21.07Jaja, Im back! (Well about time) Well what am i to say...hmmm... Um well yeah high school is almost over like less than a month left, that sux, if any of u guys read this know that i will miss u guys. I know im leaving to a far off place, like to the east coast, even thought i know ill miss everthing here, i know its for the best. I got into Williams College, feels weird saying it, i never thought i would ever go to college especially one of such caliber. I guess my main reason is to try something new, to prove to myself that i can adapt to any situation im in. I guess sometimes too i dont ever want to live with the doubt of "what if?" I want to try everything i can, go see new place, new people, new experiences and snow! lol. Well lets leave college for the future and live upon the present. This year has been the best, no doubt. Made some cool junior friends and the KG and BS people always there. Well i feel like writing more but im tired and sore(thanks to the jet sking [how i got sore, idk, and dont ask, lol]) so... ill pass. lol. So people ill write some other time Bye
6-15-07People its almost graduation! Shit i thought this would like never come, or mabey i just never wanted to notice, but point apart its here already! Well people i am going to Williams, when i made my decisions time ago, things really werent how they are now. I dont really know if i want to leave that far anymore (to the east coast by the way, lol). But i guess i have to its for my own better. I wanted to try something new and i am, proving to myself taht i can over come anythign that comes my way, even if i am alone. So yeah idk, i guess its for the best, its a neew begginning for me i guess. Lets see how i come out. Hopefully Alive, lol Ttyls' people.