«:::H:::» «:::I:::» «:::E:::» «:::N:::»

....Other than attending the famous Daytona Beach Community College, on my spare time I stop hunger in different third world countries. I've been around the world...in 62 days. I get fan mail on an hourly basis. I am the subject of numerous documentaries. I don't perspire, pass gas, or have halitosis. I lift weights the size of Toyotas. My award-winning writing made Simon cry. I am in America's top 100 most wanted, 10 most sexy singles, and 5 most intelligent people. I perfomed an open heart operation in 24 hours. I saved a bunch of money by switching to Geico. I've rescued many villages from being destroyed by forest fires. The inventions of the internet, the Mp3 player, and the DVD player were all really mine. When I'm bored, I teach astronomical physics at different universities. I proved that Ashanti can't sing. I beat Michael Jordan in a 1 on 1 match. My smile lights up the darkest room. All the celebrities are jealous because I have a nicer car than they do. The Make A Wish foundation said they'll make my dream come true...the one where all the people walking down the streets burst into flames. My friends tell me I am the computer god. One of my works of art is worth more than the Mona Lisa. Guidance counselors, doctors, and anti-suicide hotlines ask me for advice. I don't need a GSP navigation system. I make 30-minute brownies in 20 minutes. But most of all...I lowered my cholesterol.