Arty

HELLO! My name is Arthur and I like pillows, dolphins, and exclamation marks! I was born in Ubzekistan and would like to take this time to apologize... Actually, I'm proud to be an Uzbekistani and was outraged by the demoralizing, low-brow comments made against my country in the popular Borat movie. I would like to clear up some common misconceptions. First off, the movie portrayed Uzbekistan as being a country with a Jewish majority. This is a horrible lie. In fact, Jews make up a small minority of Uzbekistan, coming in fourth after Cockroaches, Christians, and Child Abusers. Yes, child abusers have their own ethnic group in my country because of their large numbers. Also, It is incorrect to say that Uzbekistanis are "Assholes." We laugh at anyone who says this because we recently changed the word "Asshole," to "Vagina" for the convenience of the pedafile population. To maintain an equilibrium, we have replaced the original word asshole, with "Mormon." I would strongly advice against calling someone a Mormon since it is a word used to identify participants of the yearly stoning festival!