DaiSy

No man hands here. It’s safe to say that my hands feel like a woman’s hands, not "Jose" your local mechanic. I have all my teeth, so no worries about any dentures falling into your eight-dollar Red Bull vodka. I’m bilingual, and will probably talk shit about you in that “other” language. I have two working eyes, but sometimes four. On occasion, I’ll wear a trendy eye patch. I piss excellence. I have ten fingers, ten toes, and two nipples. I don’t have any extras or webbed toes. I have a pair of respectable butt cheeks; it’s not a porn star pair of ass cheeks, just respectable. I can assure you it hasn’t a) gotten stuck in a doorframe, b) smashed by a desk chair, or c) recently knocked a midget unconscious. I was raised with good morals and values. And on occasion, I like to dabble in the finer things in life such as sex, drugs, and alcohol. Pump.