The shapes and space I create on my canvas have so much life, past and present. They have memory, fear, strength, possibility, hurt, love, loss, balance, desire, trust…..The contours you see, I think describe me and where my soul has been. Each one different yet still starting and stopping at the same place, expressing new and familiar experiences. The shapes themselves describe me but in the space outside of those lines is where you will find me, grasping blindly for reason and chaos. No one ever thinks to look there….Take away the structure of the shapes on my canvas but leave in tact everything it holds…..what do you see now? This is where I will breathe and die, over and over, for eternity.Painting for me is the ability to communicate with the other side and interpret a combination of my emotions and theirs. My need to create begins with a pull at the center of my core where I find myself spending hours spreading color, timelessness and stories. Stories that the souls around me share, using my canvas as the vehicle to say what it is we are both wanting to say. I find comfort in their memories, as they are not mine, and mold the two together until I find a balance of expression.My painting today is a need for survival as I cannot live without it. It completes me, it calms me and it keeps me grounded while also taking me beyond the walls of this universe, helping me to express my world combined with so many others. The moments while I am painting are beautiful and they are mine. There is a definite progression of my work, almost like a child aging. I hope I am yet still in the adolescence of my work for I want the progression to never end…The texture seen in my work is the attempt to create emotion that refuses to be contained and thus removes itself from its stagnant place of being ‘simply there’.Oil paint and a palette knife are the tools I use when composing my work.Please visit my official website at www.paintingdisorder.com
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