SOMETIMES IT'S LIKE THIS, AIN'T IT?
Retarded Cat Jump.. .... ....
A Tampa Leather Man.
I've been here in Tampa with my partner, Todd, since I got out of the Army in May of 05. I did 14 years and just got tired of Don't Ask, Don't Tell and the Rethuglican mindset and the sheep attitude. I really like Tampa and now that Ybor City is becoming a happening place I won't miss Washington, DC so much. Yup, I'm not missing DC much anymore.
I was Mr. Gulf Coast Florida Leather 2006 and competed in IML that year. It was a blast! I traveled the country promoting the leather title and the title bar, "the platform". I appreciate the opportunity Jim and Kris gave me to represent their bar and the Tampa Bay area. I made many friends, both local and everywhere else. I hope I did "our town up right" and that I can continue to.
Todd and I are now the owners/producers of the Mr. Gulf Coast Florida Leather contest.
Mr. Gulf Coast Florida Leather Web Site Link
When the platform closed, we needed a new home and Todd and I chose John and Michael's new bar, Lounge 7.14. They have since opened The Forge, which is off the patio in the back of 7.14. It's a smaller space and just right to pack in leather/levi men, for chatting each other up, and more...The Lounge 7.14 and The Forge have now closed. We thank John and Michael for giving us a space and wish them the best.
Todd and Me
We'll celebrate our 7th Anniversary on December 1st.
We were married in San Francisco 9 October. We were pronounced "spouses" at 2:45pm.
Written for Tampa's Watermark Magazine's Marriage Story
I am pleased to write to you about my marriage to my husband Todd for your Watermark marriage story. We were married on October 9th, 2008 and I still cry about it today. You said that you'd always considered yourself "married" but it wasn't until you obtained your license that the full force of the act which you were about to perform struck home. What was it like to receive that certificate that listed two men's names, linking them in a universally recognized, committed relationship, a status, one that has been practiced for nigh unto 4000 years of recorded history yet denied to us? For many I wonder if the shock of it disallows them from feeling the true cosmic weight and significance, when others take it for granted as a given in life. "Am I really married to another man? Can this be real?" I think many put their certificates in a binder, protecting them from anything that might cause these fragile pieces of paper, meaningless pieces of paper that mean so much in a world that hates those who bear it, from disintegrating in a faint current of motionless air, as if the most mindless intent of harbored doubt could cause the dream to shatter. We all say "Oh how wonderful! I's married now!" but I truly believe we cannot quite at this moment in history fully accept that. It is not yet reality. Until those who hate us give up that hatred and accept our relationships as they easily accept the morning sunrise, marriage of two men and of two women will not be a reality. We are all still living in a dream, yet a dream that is oh so happy and lovely.
When Todd and I decided to become married we were approaching our seventh year together. We didn't plan it. It was a ad hoc decision, made at the last minute because we were traveling to San Francisco and some friends said they were marrying. Weren't we? Many know we do not conform to the accepted standards of monogamy, and some privately place judgment on that, but we don't define our commitment to one another in those terms either. What does "forsaking all others" mean? For most it is only putting aside one's natural physical desires to enjoy others' sensuality and sexuality. We've all seen the neglect and heartache this brand of monogamy has caused our world. And how quickly people rend their "committed" relationships for the flimsiest of reasons! For Todd and me, "forsaking all others" takes place at a point from the pit of the stomach to the top of our heads, in our concern for each other's welfare, sanity and peace, in our communication to help the other become more fulfilled, in our desire to be next to him when he passes from this world. This is commitment. Our wedding only codified that, caused it to gel, placed a stamp on it. Truth be told, then I looked at it as a formality, but once the ceremony was complete and we stood on the stairs of the city building taking pictures I was confounded! I was physically nauseaus by the end of the day. Todd and I, like so many others before us in our country, had defied those who would call us less than human. I was in shock. We had thumbed our noses at those who proclaimed themselves more righteous, more loved, more sacred than we and yet we had proclaimed ourselves to be deserving of all these too.
We are married. That will not change. We will struggle together, to awaken each day with one another and look forward to going home at the end of the day to be with him who is our husband. The marriage certificate is only a piece of paper, true, and not for everyone, but it is the intent behind it that has shaken the foundations of our global society. So shall we continue to shake the foundations!
There's a lot more to me, to Todd and to us all than what we can fit on the electrons whizzing around here. Aren't we all whizzing electrons to begin with? Pun intended by the way...Is it all that important? That's a good question. Do we take it all with us when we go? That's probably more a conundrum than a question, and really more rhetorical. I have my thoughts, my beliefs and my values. All that matters is what matters. If one thing matters, then it all matters, for how can we decide what matters and what doesn't. If one thing does not matter, then nothing matters, so "Fuck! What's the point???"