bob bummer - ProfilesArchive

About Me

Once I was walking down the street and an anthropomorphic ketchup bottle came up and said "I once was a vegetable like you" and he opened up his jacket and out came a flock of bats and they covered my skin and just sat there and I was like "uhh... okay, I guess" and I left and walked down the street some more and it wasn't long after that that I discovered that my bat-carapace shielded me from the cancerous rays of the sun somehow or so it seemed because people around me started to drop like flies and sizzle on the ground like your eggbrain on drugs like in that old your-brain-on-drugs commercial and I can only assume it was because of the sun or something like it and so I went to an ice-cream shoppe and bought the bats a treat for saving my life.

My Interests

reading, politics, history, guitar, songwriting, life

I'd like to meet:

desperate aliens

Music:

the perceptics, nirvana, radiohead, the raincoats, the velvet underground, wire, autolux, alice in chains, kyuss, queens of the stone age, sleepytime gorilla museum, cheer-accident, sonic youth, flipper, pavement, the pixies, slint, neutral milk hotel, the beatles, daniel johnston, jeremy enigk, elliott smith, nick drake, os mutantes, the sonics, creedence clearwater revival, godspeed you! black emperor, sigur ros, pink floyd, led zeppelin, the doors, jandek, the foo fighters, liars, the mars volta, melvins, tomahawk, rage against the machine, muse, arcade fire, the rapture, sunny day real estate, the vaselines, the white stripes, the wipers, radioactive prostitute

Movies:

brazil, fight club, barton fink, the big lebowski, festen, gummo, beyond the valley of the dolls, apocolypse now, freaks

Television:

arrested development, the daily show, the colbert report, the simpsons, sealab 2021, aqua teen hunger force, curb your enthusiasm, the office, futurama, wonder showzen, harvey birdman, king of the hill... AND MORE.

Books:

the brothers karamazov, 1984, one flew over the cuckoo's nest, the narrative of arthur gordon pym, hocus pocus, animal farm, choke, crime & punishment, catcher in the rye, lord of the flies, the red badge of courage, moby dick, brave new world, catch-22

Heroes:

bill hicks, stephen colbert

My Blog

War with Iran is coming in September.

BOB Baer, the former Middle East CIA operative whose first book about his life inspired the oil-and-espionage thriller Syriana, is working on a new book on Iran, but says he was told by senior intelli...
Posted by bob bummer on Fri, 31 Aug 2007 04:31:00 PST

Let's all get up and dance to a song.

Smallpox.
Posted by bob bummer on Thu, 05 Apr 2007 03:44:00 PST

I really have nothing at all to say.

Boredom compels me.
Posted by bob bummer on Sat, 13 Jan 2007 10:34:00 PST

Cut the hand of the aggressor.

I had a dream that I met Mahmoud Ahmadinejad. He was a kind old man with sad eyes, and we went camping. We sat around a fire telling stories. At one point he turned to me and asked, "What makes you...
Posted by bob bummer on Wed, 19 Apr 2006 06:50:00 PST

WOLFMAN COMES ALIVE.

I have survived a cardiac catheterization.
Posted by bob bummer on Fri, 27 Jan 2006 02:51:00 PST

See you in hell, jerks!

Hey everybody! I just found out my heart is 30% weaker than it was a few years ago! Awesome!
Posted by bob bummer on Thu, 19 Jan 2006 10:33:00 PST

The local bird + bee.

I saw a man pursuing the horizon; Round and round they sped. I was disturbed at this; I accosted the man. "It is futile," I said, "You can never -- " "You lie," he cried, And ran on....
Posted by bob bummer on Sun, 30 Oct 2005 08:52:00 PST

Haiku.

Sparks are inside me A slow asphyxiation Putting me to sleep.
Posted by bob bummer on Sat, 22 Oct 2005 12:41:00 PST

I need a lampshade to put on my head.

Another wonderful day of Percocet, guitar, and video games. I was really under the impression that I was going to be in serious pain after getting three wisdom teeth removed. That, however, doe...
Posted by bob bummer on Sun, 02 Oct 2005 11:59:00 PST

Sewing circles.

I just got my final three wisdom teeth removed. Thank heavens for Percocet. In other news, I'm one week away from starting school. I've been working almost 80 hours a week for the last four mo...
Posted by bob bummer on Sat, 01 Oct 2005 04:42:00 PST