Making money. Drinking. Women. Boating. Cars. Driving in cars with hot women to a boat to go do some drinking and getting paid for it... I have aspirations.
Heidi Fleiss... I'm sure she'd have some good pointers.
Heidi Klum... Because she's flippin hot.
Jimmy Buffett... Anybody who can get that many drunk people to shut up and have fun is sweet.
Warren Buffett... Because Jimmy's brother has to be just as cool.
Any HOT women... who have other hot female friends that they enjoy touching in special places and would like me to help them out.
(NOTE: I said hot, not ugly. If you think you're hot and you are not, I will correct your assertion.)
Who I Wouldn't Like To Meet:
Any bitches... who are so self absorbed that they fail to realize that the greatest thing that could ever come out of their mouths would be my cock.
People who lack a basic sense of humor... lighten the fuck up already.
Douchebags who have to start altercations to get attention... calm down, we know you're there, you just lack a personality that anyone wants to pay attention to.
Anyone who wants to push their cause on me... if I didn't care when the last asshole talked my ear off about it yesterday, I'm not going to suddenly give a fuck today either. Unless you're trying to get me to sign a petition that invoves me drinking more or getting more ass, leave me the fuck alone. Enjoy your oppionions, but don't be a hater because I don't share them.
People who go on daytime talkshows to talk about they baby mamma or how they don't know who they baby daddy is... Seriously, you people should be restricted to anal sex only.
Anyone who thinks the world should pitty them... everybody has problems, quit dwelling on them and your life might seem a little better... or just get drunk with the rest of us and say "fuck it!"
And Finally, A Toast:
Stolen from Captain Tim, who stole it from Pete B, who probably stole it from someone else:
Here's to us.
Here's to those like us.
Here's to those who want to be like us,
Fuck 'em,
Heres to us.
Sláinte!
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My life is like a million songs... they just all end up playing at the same time so I can never enjoy just one.. I listen to just about everything from rock to country to rap & R&B. Just all depends on the mood. Some of the best would be The Eagles, Jack Johnson, Jonny Lang, The Temptations, Matt Costa, Jackson Browne, Jimmy Buffett, Journey, 2Pac, Kenny Chesney, etc., etc. You can tell how scrambled my music tastes are by the playlist to the right.
Dazed and Confused, Van Wilder, Scarface, Carlito's Way, Wedding Crashers, The 40 Year Old Virgin, Sin City, BaseKetball, Napolean Dynamite, the Jersey Trilogy from Kevin Smith... anything with crude humor and an obvious lack of morals...
The West Wing (So long... we'll miss you old friend), Entourage, Family Guy, South Park, I don't watch too much TV. I have way too much masturbation to get done. But, I guess in line with the masturbation thing is The Girls Next Door... I'm now seemingly addicted to watching this too, since I love playmates and I want to buy the Playboy Mansion someday.
7 Habits of Highly Effective People by Steven Covey, The Driving Force by Peter W. Schutz, How to Win Friends & Influence People by Dale Carnegie, Sperm Wars by Robin Baker, etc. Anything motivating. I'm too lazy to read for pleasure. that's what sex, beer, and movies are for. Actually, The Game by Neil Strauss & I Hope They Serve Beer In Hell by Tucker Max are entertaining as hell. I read each of them in a night. I'm considering reading some of the old classics like The Count of Monte Cristo by Alexandre Dumas, père, The Great Gatsby by F. Scott Fitzgerald, and The Catcher in the Rye by J. D. Salinger... mostly becuase I should have read those in highschool, but I never actually did anything when I actually did go.
Hugh M. Heffner (for his ability to bang hot ass twentysomethings when he's 80 years old. A lot of guys have 20 year old trophy wives when they're old and rich... Hef has 3!), Warren Buffett (for being humble enough to live in a 2300 sq. ft. house when he is the second richest man on the planet... no yachts of rediculous size, not stable of $3 millon cars, just the thrill of being the best investor Wall Street has ever seen), Larry Page & Sergey Brin (for allowing me to find anything whenever I want with their little project called Google. You might have heard of it. If you haven't, check it out), Bill Gates (for stalking me in my sleep with all of the tracking systems he's had so lovingly installed into Microsoft Windows... Hey, at least he didn't have to slaughter millions of innocent people to become the richest man in the world... just annoy then all with bundled software), Larry Ellison (especially for the Rising Sun and the MegaYacht war he's started with Paul Allen and Roman Abramovich becuase... "I like big yachts and i cannot lie, you other brothers can't deny, when a yacht pulls in with an itty bitty waist and a round thing in your face you get sprung...), Paul Allen (for his contribution to the massively ginormous yachting world with Octopuss), Roman Abramovich (for owning three of the world's 100 largest yachts and secretly building one that will be the largest yacht ever built... 600 feet and counting), Aristotle Onasis (for starting the MegaYaching thing with the Chirstina O, and for not letting that little greek bitch Stavros Niarchos push him around... anybody who's grand kid wants to marry Paris Hilton has some fucked up genes to begin with) and anyone else who has a net worth larger than the yearly operating budget of a small country. Oh, and my favorite tard, Jimmy