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i live in peoria, il, i was going to school for business admin, and i was planning on finishing that up, but recently ive thought about maybe going to cosmetology school instead because i actually really enjoy working with hair and style and stuff. i cut / color my own hair and i do it for friends also and have fun. i guess i have untill the end of summer to really decide.
hmm, im close with my family, ive been out since i was 14 and it was all fine. i have 3 little brothers, 2 of which are twins. im originally from jacksonville florida, i moved to illinois when i was 12. i dont have a biological father but i have a step father, thats amazing and has been in my life since i was 8, and they got married when i was 8 so i guess ive always seen love work and am hopeful on the subject. i usually go down home for holidays and stuff.
what else about me . . .umm, im pretty indecisive, i have add, like seriously haha, i listen to music when i goto bed, im a romantic, i like candles and stuff haha, i have a small temper, usually when i dont get my way :) i bite my nails, im very polite, i usually prefer eating out than at home unless im cokking for more than 1, i have a pet, her name is anna, shes a python, and 2 years old. im a big procrastinator, i used to be really optimistic but as time goes by i think i get more pessimistic. althoguh when i think of the future and possible plans, my brain and heart thinks for 2 <3.
im not materialistic or superficial, so i guess im a minority in the gay community :) i think i was raised right and have good morals, i think im a pretty good hearted boy. im a very affectionate person, and it makes me smile when i see people like at a restaurant and they sit next to each other instead of across :) i still look up in amazement and smile when im walking around downtown and seeing all the buildings, even though ive seen them like a hundred times before. im one of those people that keeps a shoe box of momentos from the past, even past relationships. im a really forgiving person when it comes to being wronged, as long as theres a real sincere apology. umm, im not too political, but i do vote, and ill actually look into what theyre about before i vote, but thats about the extent of it.
oh jeez, i probably spend alot more time than i should playing video games. but i do alot more things in the summer. i like stuff like final fantasy, resident evil, halo, mortal kombat, need for speed, diablo and world of warcraft. in the summer i like to do alot more; such as working out, rollerblading, swimming (i love the beach) tennis, hiking, camping and just being out and about.
i do alot of writing, such as poetry, and some songwriting, but i never submit anything for publishing. im also learning to play the guitar, that way i can actually sing the songs i write haha.
umm, i dont know what else to say, only a couple people will probably read this anyways haha. i guess if you wanna know something i havent told, just ask me.i think im pretty shy when it comes to starting conversations online, so if you wanna talk you should message me, cuz i might be looking at you but scared to say hi and hoping you will :-D
RAININGMIX
((((((((( old, but i guess ill leave it ))))))))) okay so im just gonna redo my myspace info, cuz im in an emotional mood tonight and i just wanna get my thoguhts down somewhere, so its gonna be here i guess. so lately ive kinda hated my life cuz i think i have a shitty job, i havent started college yet, i live in damn peoria, i dont have an luxurious car, and it just seems in general everyone around me is doing better than me and getting more out of life. i get shit all the time for not started school yet, and drives me even more insane. but its just not so easy after youre outa hs for a few years. and lately it just seems everything i start or try just fails. I think back to where i pictured myself back when i was 16 and im so far outa the picture.
in the "gay community" i think i prolly have a bad reputation, mostly due to a couple queens and bitter ex's and people just listen to everything they hear, and then go on to repeat it, and i dont care, cuz anyone that goes along like that, isnt anyone i want in my life.
i think about what ive acomplished since ive gotten out of high school, to try to justify something in my mind, and i guess i have learned alot, even though i havent furthered school yet. ive gotten my so called "slut phase" out of the way, ive done all my crazy partying and drinking already. ive done the club scene, ive loved, been loved, ive used, ive been used, ive hurt, and been hurt. ive been to jail lol, ive volunteered for the community, ive helped younger gay kids just comming out, ive been a good big brother hehe, i have a family that openly accepts me for who i am and loves me, even though my country doesent lol. ive protested, ive voted, ive visited another country, ive gained more compassion for others, i think more realisticly.
so i havent been to college yet, but ive still learned pleanty and am still working towards a future. in the last few crazy years, ive had some amazing friends, and still have my small handful of awesome people that i know will be there forever and have helped shape me into who i am today.
so yeah, as of now, im just gonna leave the past problems and regrets in the past, and work towards my future. focusing on bettering myself, getting into school, getting a better job, making a better future for myself, and everyone else that will be in my life.
and to the people that have been here by my side through it all, all along, thank you, and i love you.
and to the people that are gonna wanna be here by my side in the future, thank you, and maybe i'll love you too someday. im sure i can meet / make some smazing new friends on myspace, its just everyone youd see somewhere in a bookstore, or mall, or starbucks, or walmart or whatever, just more conveinient :)
