In the boonies of Toledo, Ohio, where the music is sparse, where the people are constantly getting telemarketing calls, where american idol contestants are born, not raised, the Light Ahead makes their sound. A crazy cool sound at that. This lovely quintet was fused together in the heart-warming year of 2005 and in the hell-bearing month of december by guitarist, Greg, and drummer, Jason. Not more than a few decades later they found Ben, the bassist, in your mom's shed. Finally, in late 2006, their band was completed with the addition of DMX. A little known fact about DMX is that he also goes by the name of Daniel. Then, on a shiny New England morning, Dan (DMX) found out that he was pregnant (ut oh!). Fortunately, Dan's baby came out of his womb singing "Better off Dead" by New Found Glory. Now ladies and gentlemen, as you know this an opportunity that we could not pass up. Dan named the baby Brandyn and branded him "The Light Ahead's lead singer and only person in the band who likes boys". Together, they altered the genre of pop-punk as you know it. Their music will grab you by the feet and swing you until they have your shoes. Then they'll have your shoes; so what about that? HUH? Their running drumlines sound as if a drunken baboon was wildly obstructing a hollowed log as if it were something in need of much punishment. Their bass lines will flow through your ears, and blast out your butt. (This do you like? We sure do.) For this reason, take caution, and wear adult diapers to their shows. Their guitar riffs are ...ok. Listen to them and maybe they'll throw you a bone. In conclusion, the grapes must be harvested in order to determine the polo champion.
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