Spitting Teeth

When Neil Ofsteel and xVeganxMeichxthexNeckbeardx got together in late 1999 to record classic hits by legendary Ellensburg Hardcore band, Nuclear Barbeque, they had no idea that their shared passion for the songs of Nuclear Barbeque would be the propellant of the career of Spitting Teeth. Originally named SHITBASTARD after Mike's childhood pet, the duo set about playing their first show in spring of 2000 with temporary drummer Jaimie. The term "Lost Classic" is branded about loosely but this largely Improvised set, consisting of such gems as "Nuts in a Vise" and "Yus!" became the very definition of the term "Lost classic." Mostly because whoever had the one VHS copy of it won't share it. You cocksucker, you know who you are. In late 2000, Mike was moved to drums and E.SOTO was brought in on guitar. Neil, possessing no musical talent whatsoever, remained on vocals. Bass players were for pussies, they thought, but they were proved wrong when xRobxFromxYourxGrandmotherx was brought in to play drums and Mike was moved to guitar and Evan to bass. Again, Neil was on vocals. Over the course of the next year, Spitting Teeth(name changed due to legal disputes with the 8 other Shitbastards in the U.S.) played approximately 200 shows, although that's probably a low estimate. In early 2002, Robbi was replaced with Joe Grindlingsawaxemurdleburgenstein, Seattle's only metal drummer. Mike was moved from guitar to cocaine, Evan was moved from bass to record snob and Neil was moved to yuppie/pussy. Over the next year, they played 3 shows. In late 2003, or was it 2004? I don't remember. They called it quits, reuniting only once in spring 2004 because there was alot of money involved, never to be heard of again. Mike went on to great success as the sultry frontman of the hardcore outfit FURIOUS STYLES, Joe went on to play in every metal band ever, Evan was in another band by then anyway so who cares, right? and Neil is still on vocals as he is still devoid of talent. If you'd like us to reunite, just throw lots of money at us. Thanks. -Spitting Teeth