Slick Nips profile picture

Slick Nips

The tuba player was swept away, screaming.

About Me


Ex-Pro-Sledgehammerer, paramedic/firefighter in the making, rock star, spleen flenser. I try to keep my life drizzled in rich meaty gravy that is easily sopped up. I like drawin', paintin, coloring books, tending to injured drunks, brewskis, weapons both edged and blunt, comfy nests, food of the GOOD variety, cooking said foods or having them served by sultry wenches, storms of arrows, monkeys, and straight rockin' the house with mad grooves and sick moves. Below lies a brief history of my time as a Lanista.These fellows rock. And their flyer artist is a God. Any bands that need flyers, posters, or other artwork, contact me. I can draw almost anything, but I prefer scenes of breathtaking violence and depravity.

My Interests



Gentle, violent beatings, drawing and art in general, books, cliched rock star poses, camping, improvised explosives, flesh markets, dogs, throwing rocks, well, throwing anything and missing, heavy armored vehicles, like the new Honda Civic, diggin' holes, browned meats and lush blanched veggies, biking around, bein' a merc for the French, shiny leather things, well, shiny things in general, food of the GOOD variety, junk, messes, shades of brown (not in a gross way), fighting crime, candlelight dinners with plenty of warm, home baked breads, rusted steel hulks, saving lives, takin' SAMPLE histories, startin' shit, making faces, and bein a straight pimp.

I'd like to meet:



Somebody who uses their momma's arm as a murder weapon. Richard Simmons, glowering women with wicked sharp minds and sassy attitudes, King Leonidas, my ancestors, Matt Groening, and any Elder God.

Music:


Tom Waits, Clutch, Ween, Wrinklebomb, Deadsea, Early Man, Guru, Neutral Milk Hotel, Ass ponies, Pj Harvey, The Sword, High on Fire, Mastodon, Hayden, King Missile, Black Sheep, Fiona Apple, Hole, Gwar, The Who, Wolfmother, Public Enemy, Supersuckers, Led Zeppelin, Mazzy Star, Jeff Buckley, Bob Dylan, Bruce Springsteen, DMX, Down, Transplants, Journey, Twisted Sister, Iron Maiden, Mojave 3, Pavement, Tool, Tenacious D, The Hairy Patt Band, White Stripes, Mozart, Geto Boys, NWA, Barry White, Iris Dement, Dwarves, Kanye West, Auf der Maur, Lifter Puller, Archers of Loaf, Beonce, Master P, and on....MY FINEST MOMENT.

Movies:



Miller's Crossing, Sin City, Braveheart, Fight Club, Conan the Barbarian, Lord of the Rings, Office Space, Big Lebowski, Barton Fink, Anchorman, Raising Arizona, Most Star Wars stuff, Raiders of the Lost Ark, Shawshank Redemption, Unforgiven, Saving Private Ryan, SNAKES ON A MOTHAFUCKIN PLANE, Austin Powers, Fearless, Thin Red Line, The Dark Backward, Aliens, Predator, Henry V, Shrek, Incredibles, Man Bites Dog, Sling Blade, Iron Giant, Reservoir Dogs, Pulp Fiction, The Ninth Configuration, Cool Hand Luke, Platoon, Full Metal Jacket, Gladiator, Toy Story, Master and Commander, Delicatessen, Seven, Glory, Kate and Leopold(not), Napoleon Dynamite, Last of the Mohicans, The Good, the Bad, and the Ugly, The Thing, Terminator, Spartacus, Clockwork Orange, Serenity, Kung Fu Hustle, Drunken Master, all the Die Hards (yes, ALL), Hell, do you get it? I love movies!!.. width="425" height="350" ..

Television:


Cleveland Indians, Cleveland Browns, LOST. Rome. Deadwood. Sopranos. Family Guy. Simpsons. Jeopardy! Dog Whisperer.Info about my MYTHIC girlfriend.Shub-Niggurath in the mythosShub-Niggurath is an Outer God in the pantheon. She is a perverse fertility deity said to appear as an enormous cloudy mass which extrudes black tentacles, slime-dripping mouths, and short, writhing goat legs. Small creatures are spat forth, which are either reconsumed into the miasmatic form or escape to some monstrous life elsewhere. [edit] Cult One squat, black temple of Tsathoggua was encountered, but it had been turned into a shrine of Shub-Niggurath, the All-Mother and wife of the Not-to-Be-Named-One. This deity was a kind of sophisticated Astarte, and her worship struck the pious Catholic as supremely obnoxious. —H.P. Lovecraft and Zealia Bishop, "The Mound" Of all the mythos deities, Shub-Niggurath is probably the most extensively worshiped. Her worshipers include the Hyperboreans, the Muvians, and the people of Sarnath, as well as any number of druidic and barbaric cults. She is also worshiped by the non-human species of the mythos, such as the "Fungi from Yuggoth" (the Mi-Go) and the Nug-Soth of Yaddith. [1] With the proper occult paraphernalia, Shub-Niggurath can be summoned to any woodlands at the time of the new moon. However, the place from whence she comes is not known. One possibility is that she dwells at the court of Azathoth at the center of the universe. She may also live beneath the planet Yaddith, where she is served by the Dholes. It is also possible that she lives in another dimension altogether.

Books:


Neil Stephenson is my present favorite, Chuckles Bukowski, William Gibson (Nueromancer), Bangkok 8, Master and Commander,The Killer Angels, Clockwork Orange, Stephen King shit, The Orphan, The Tender Bar, The Monkey Wrench Gang and Hayduke Lives, Slow Cooker Cookbook, Brochures, Fight Club(any Palahniuk book), Bringing Out the Dead, Night Dogs, Sympathy for the Devil, 1776, The Fermata, H.P. Lovecraft, Robert E. Howard, Keruoac, Snow Crash, Nam, The Secret Lives of Dogs, Lord of the Rings Trilogy, Da Vinci code, Frog and Toad are Friends and Sweet Pickles...I'll read anything, basically.

Heroes:



My Father.

My Blog

Lazy

He sat in the back seat, dark van. Cold day keeps the beer cold. He shifted his bulk, shocks rocking with the van creak. He sighed. Hard. Beer close. No more methadone. Quivering is hard. Flab shift. ...
Posted by Slick Nips on Mon, 15 Jan 2007 07:34:00 PST

Douchebag Podcast

http://blog.myspace.com/index.cfm?fuseaction=blog.view&frien dID=436528&blogID=205662222&Mytoken=B776B48A-253A-4E08-B5851 07E93B264783951250
Posted by Slick Nips on Fri, 15 Dec 2006 05:40:00 PST

This Morning's Dream

I'm walking through a TERRIBLE part of Cleveland (scrap brain zone) with my father after some sort of sporting event. We have to cross busy highways, vaulting embankments, but there's a train that has...
Posted by Slick Nips on Fri, 08 Dec 2006 06:51:00 PST

Cool Wizards

Nephalgock sipped his mojito, surveying the crowded club with gleaming eyes."Lots of trim on display tonight!" he murmered as a pastel school of jiggling wench-flesh paraded by him. He straightened hi...
Posted by Slick Nips on Tue, 05 Dec 2006 01:45:00 PST

The Hens.

The food lay clumped in his hand-it was moist with nervous sweat. He unconsciously rammed the gummy handful into his gob and it sprayed over his tongue as he chewed spasmodically, grubs drizzling onto...
Posted by Slick Nips on Tue, 21 Nov 2006 08:14:00 PST

Might

He smiled, his face rippling with might. The shock wave of his dimple vanquished colonies of mites and gnats that dwelled upon and around him. Their corpses drifted down and rattled about his feet. Hi...
Posted by Slick Nips on Fri, 17 Nov 2006 07:33:00 PST

Paris Hilton

He couldn't think of a better human being. She personified every ideal and paragon he had come to expect from the fairer sex. Whenever her lips parted to speak (not to suck cock), the words that trill...
Posted by Slick Nips on Fri, 03 Nov 2006 10:34:00 PST

Advanced Matador.

Grit crunched beneath his sequined loafers as a belly hot wind burped through the arena, ruffling his previously perfect mane of mulleted hair. He gestured with his rocket launcher to the howling crow...
Posted by Slick Nips on Fri, 20 Oct 2006 09:28:00 PST

MAY HE GO

Spent the last eight days in the sweltering beach deserts of Mexico, in Puerto Escondido, one of the best and easily conquered surf spots in the world. Couple things about Mexico; 1. Every building is...
Posted by Slick Nips on Wed, 11 Oct 2006 08:26:00 PST

The Sorcermancer.

Ed squinted at the mirror, befuddled that horror was not ensuing. The candles, made from the tallow of a screaming virgin murdered by her mother at the moment of her deflowering, guttered, giving off ...
Posted by Slick Nips on Thu, 28 Sep 2006 10:42:00 PST