Uncle Jute

I've been in the jute business longer than jute itself. I am the number one jute distributor for the midwest, and darn proud of it. I have a pull-up bar in my garden room. Depending on the weather, I have between one and two "trick knees". I live almost exclusively on jute, beef jerky, and cheap American beer. I am fiercely proud of my moustachio, bushy eyebrows, and fashion eyeglasses. I use steel wool to shave. I use jute for most things.